Post wank vision

Post-wank vision helps improve your judgement on relationship decisions when your horny. When you take off the ‘wank goggles’ your mind will be clearer, allowing you to assess relationship decisions based on there true attributes (and not just her fine ass).
Eoghan: *thinks to himself* awwwwww fuck that took way too long. Thank god for twins.

Eoghan text: mate, my post wank vision suggests I should keen this chick around.

Andrew M: nice move mate, all big calls should be made with a clear mind.

What time will I meet you for the McGregor fight?
by Some mate1 January 26, 2020
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Wanking The Worm

A Prank that Many kids do these days.It only means ,to fuck yourself (Totally does not mean to pull your third leg up and down)
"Hey Look Im Wanking The Worm! "

Its Imposible to Wank THE Worm"
by MyBallsAreVeryItchy July 08, 2023
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Tropical wank

A type of masturbation that happens only in an environment where it is hot outside, the window is open and a warm breeze permeates the air. Extra points if there is a fan on or some form of light air conditioning to really get that fruity feeling.
I had a tropical wank last night, you should try it!
by Sensualgreg July 18, 2022
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Deliveroo and wank

The apotheosis of living for the modern middle aged family man. Netflix and chill, for husbands who have long ago abandoned both erotic frisson and euphemism.
"The wife's away, so I'm going to treat myself to a Deliveroo and wank."

"You mean..."

"Yes, a lukewarm curry followed by furious self abuse."
by bighairyotter August 10, 2021
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Wank muppet

The sock you use to cover your cock which catches your cum when masturbating.
by Christophlambpie August 15, 2023
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Travel Wank

Carrying genitals or sexual
Pleasure toys on the go, prepared impromptu wank on the go.
by Acidbbq March 19, 2022
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wank couch

A couch you should never ever sit on. Smells a bit musty and tacky to the touch.
This is the wank couch, I'd sit somewhere else if I were you.
by Camo Clown February 16, 2017
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