Texas Pete facial

When you shake a slightly opened bottle of Texas Pete hot sauce unknowing that it was open and slinging hot sauce into someone’s face and eyes.
That shit was hot!!

Well that’s a Texas Pete facial for ya.
by Soupdetaco March 09, 2024
Get the Texas Pete facial mug.

Texas Road Chili

To get butt fucked while driving and for them to shit on your dick and then stir it around with you dick and leave your dick inside of her to make it hot and moist.
Hey billy? Did you "Texas Road Chili " my daughter last night?
Yea she was only 4!
Aw hell yea you should have invited me to the party!
by Creditreport.com May 13, 2018
Get the Texas Road Chili mug.

Texas Swamp Donkey

The girl your friend is a tad ashamed of.
Mostly found in rural southern river towns. Usually not attractive, but usually rock a solid farm girl ass and rack. Most smoke, drink, and are premiscus. If they have kids they never have custody or the mother assumes responsibility.
A Texas Swamp Donkey is always a female, very stout, and between a 2 and 4 in attractiveness.
by LazyLarry27 December 13, 2020
Get the Texas Swamp Donkey mug.

Texas Peach

Text to speech used by somebody who talks to their phone like it is their therapist, and not a robot converting their gibberish inner-monologue.
Usually accompanied by run-on sentences lacking punctuation, often sprinkled homophones with , and frequently reads worse than something written by someone with English as a second language.
Customer: "... I would say that is weigh to much for a bike that cost almost 2 grand, how am I to make sense in spending so much, need a front rim north background should be used on this bike because of the weight of it, I offered to send the rim to you at my cost, your bike mechanics know that they can match true it at 100%, why else would they give me a Saul brush off, I need your cooperation in getting test done, I am a consumer of this spike.."
*30 clauses later*
Customer: "Sorry using SIRI Texas Peach"
by BlurpleHippo January 18, 2022
Get the Texas Peach mug.

texas peach

When you take a girl home and her taint stinks from riding horses on the ranch all day, so you pour a can of peaches on her pussy and use the heavy syrup as lube AND to cover up the smell. Bonus, after sex you get some ice cream, mix with the smashed up peaches, and have a nice snack.

Girl come over here and let me turn you into a texas peach.
texas peach
by cowboy don bird November 20, 2013
Get the texas peach mug.

Texas phone call massacre

Texas phone call massacre:
When a grown man jacks off with a kids sock, and then cums all over laundry in a hotel laundry room; while trying to make a call sticking the phone up his ass while the cops are on the way. (A.K.A.) —no way out.
Ran into a spunion and his occupation was kissing ass, didn’t believe him. So I found out myself next to an elavator. He was commiting a texas phone call massacre.
by BTK ALL DAY August 30, 2018
Get the Texas phone call massacre mug.

McLeod, Texas

McLeod, Texas is a small town where the main export is meth. Some are users, some are distributors. If you tell anyone you're from McLeod, Texas, there is a chance someone will ask... "So, do you have any meth?"
This guy was from McLeod, Texas. He was asked by a guy in Atlanta if he had any meth. The guy from McLeod said no.
by Dr. Politico January 12, 2019
Get the McLeod, Texas mug.