a nigel danger wank
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
by mrs tosser October 7, 2025
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by Jessdirty April 20, 2021
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by FuckinBlazeItM8 October 29, 2015
Get the absolutely wanked mug.A Wank of MAMILs. The collective term to describe a group of middle aged men in Lycra who cycle together. It generally comprises of males aged between 40 & 60 years of age wearing matching Lycra tops and shorts. To be a member of this grouping, members must have a bike between $7000 & $10000 in value. These group are regularly found inhabiting cafes in the early morning hours with their shirts undone to their navels and wearing sunglasses that cost more than an average person’s weekly wage. The usual sounds emanating from a wank of mamils involves bravado using terms like “managed funds”, “options trading” and FX rates.
Oh look the reason the cafe is so busy this morning is because we have a wank of mamils with their bikes clogging the footpath.
by Cycle,lover January 23, 2021
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