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Jake

by Sterling Hawksmoor August 24, 2021
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Jake

“I really wanna put my peepeee in Jake.”
by Sloppiboi December 16, 2018
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Jake From State Farm

That punk assed bitch who calls late night flirting with you about hooking up in some khakis
That muhfucka who was shot in the ass by my homeboy for callin’ his chick at 3 in the morning, yeah that was Jake from State Farm.
by DVillan October 11, 2020
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Pulling a Jake

When you've got a big test or assignment due, but call in sick until you're certain that though at-home study you'll get a good mark. Pulling a Jake also includes telling all your friends that you did bad in a test, only to receive the highest grade possible at a later date.
James: Why isn't Tom at school today?
Bob: I think he's pulling a Jake.
James: Yeah probably, and I bet that when he turns up he'll tell us he that he failed the test.
by AnonGuyILikePie July 1, 2014
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Jake

A little bitch who steals all the girls when he gets mad. He usually has a big cock, and always wants to fuck.
Jake the big cock daddy sucked somebody else’s dick
by Cocks are niceeee March 3, 2020
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Jake Paul vs Nate Diaz

Hey, he's getting pretty good, man.

Hym "I'm watching Jake Paul vs Nate Diaz and I'm thinking (Keep in mind I only saw the highlights): Good jab work from like round 4 up from Jake. That could have started sooner. Has more than just an overhand now (I think he dropped him with the left hook). But he stands like a fucking mannequin. Move your fucking head a little bit. I heard once that if you're already in motion it's easier to accelerate quickly (I can't remember in what context though...) rather that if you're stationary.
The amount of time and energy it take to go from stationary to moving in either direction is greater for some reason (and I've heard it before but I can't remember). Which is what you are. Largely stationary. You're perfectly still on the centerline. You should be bobbing around on either side (This is all theory obviously and the most extreme example of which would be Clay Guida or something). That's why from round 4 onwards he was getting ABSOLUTELY Tea'd off on. I think if Nate would have let his hands go earlier he wouldn't have gone down in the-"

Iam "OH! SHORT LOW INTERCEPTING HOOK! THAT'S WHAT DOWNED HIM! AS HE WAS COMING IN!? THAT'S A JEET KUNE DO THING! THAT WAS BRILLIANT."

Hym *clears throat* "The first place. I think if he wouldn't have gotten wobbled in the 1st it would have been a totally different fight. Just hear me out, watch the difference in the head movement. As Nate lumbers across the ring you can see his head. Left right left right. Jake? Stiff as a board. And Nate slips a ton of punches throughout the match as a result. But at least Jake was keeping his giant punchable torso safe. It just isn't possible to fight a guy with decathelete cardio if you're getting punched all up in your organs."

Jake Paul vs Nate Diaz
by Hym Iam August 7, 2023
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Jake Spray Tan

A Jake Spray Tan is when you shit the bed during your sleep bad enough to permanently stain not only your entire back but the entirety of the bed you were sleeping in.
I booked a hotel after a night out with the boys and I woke up the next morning to a Jake Spray Tan on my bed
by Informativity January 26, 2021
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