The Twat
I once knew a man that was a twat,
He's every thought was that of an imbecile...
He was wholly unjustified in his every word;
When he was in a twatish mood...
Which was exceedingly annoying,
And didn't take anything to start him off...
Save perhaps being content or happy;
You'd think that he was jealous, but this twat was not...
The twat uhh'd and err'd and ahh'd,
Because he was an annoying twat as well...
He passed twatish judgements of events;
And his twat brain got it wrong 100% every time...
He never said please or thank you,
Because he had twat manners too...
And he never gave praise and rarely encouragement;
Because he was an ungrateful twat also...
He preferred the company of fools,
Because they made him look good compared to him...
But only a twat would be so easily pleased;
Like boasting of being a lolly stick stood up in dog shit...
Well; the twat didn't have many friends,
Because.people saw.right through him...
He was fine approximately half of the time;
Which suggests his brain was divided between a twat half and normal...
Quiet why this guy was a twat?
Defies all explanations...
If the best we can do is to just annoy people;
Then that is the most twatish excuse for an existence...
I once knew a man that was a twat,
He's every thought was that of an imbecile...
He was wholly unjustified in his every word;
When he was in a twatish mood...
Which was exceedingly annoying,
And didn't take anything to start him off...
Save perhaps being content or happy;
You'd think that he was jealous, but this twat was not...
The twat uhh'd and err'd and ahh'd,
Because he was an annoying twat as well...
He passed twatish judgements of events;
And his twat brain got it wrong 100% every time...
He never said please or thank you,
Because he had twat manners too...
And he never gave praise and rarely encouragement;
Because he was an ungrateful twat also...
He preferred the company of fools,
Because they made him look good compared to him...
But only a twat would be so easily pleased;
Like boasting of being a lolly stick stood up in dog shit...
Well; the twat didn't have many friends,
Because.people saw.right through him...
He was fine approximately half of the time;
Which suggests his brain was divided between a twat half and normal...
Quiet why this guy was a twat?
Defies all explanations...
If the best we can do is to just annoy people;
Then that is the most twatish excuse for an existence...
Wot a Twat!
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