Speed Dump

The act of taking a normal sized dump in under 1 minute.

Steve "JT just took a speed dump."
Ian "What's a speed dump?"
Steve "It's what he does."

by Steve Nurse January 15, 2006

speed of old

The speed at which the elderly travel; this can be 5-10 miles under the speed limit whilst driving or just moving very slowly in front of you. It is a very frustrating phenomenon.

Aaaugh god dammit! Why won't she stop traveling at the speed of old! I've got stuff to do!

by domesticus July 17, 2010

Speed Doogan

The act of leaving a room, going to the bathroom (number 2) and then returning to the room in under 1.5 minutes.

Can also be spelled SPEED DUGAN.

Yo Phil, did you really just take a sh!t that fast? Man that was a serious SPEED DOOGAN!

by MJVcuse June 30, 2007

fire speed

Internet capable of downloading full length movies in under 10 minutes.

We should download movies at Matt's house. He has a fire speed connection.

by Trevor Calvin January 21, 2008

speed tears

The resulting eye-watering caused by attaining a high speed on a motor vehicle without eye protection.

I was about to shift into fourth gear when the speed tears blinded me, and I had to back off.

by Galaxie4271 December 27, 2007

Speed Fluctuator

A person who continuously changes the speed at which they drive regardless of the speed limit.

An example of a speed fluctuator would be someone driving on a 55 mph highway fluctuating their speed between 50 and 60 mph. This very annoying behavior makes it impossible for the poor person stuck behind them to use their cruise control.

by Daren Hathaway January 7, 2009

speed test

Similar to the speed test used to test your internet connection, but this speed test is used to determine which checkout line is moving faster. It involves a snap judgment as to (1) which checkout clerk looks the least likely to encounter a situation in which they have to call the manager, and (2) which customers are least likely to have some sort of problem at checkout.

I used the speed test at Costco and got burned when the line I changed into was actually slower than the line I moved out of.

by Ae5Ea8 April 5, 2015