Jizz Jack

The act of ejaculating into your own hand and punching the very unfortunate victim by surprise in the face, usually resulting in them being knocked unconscious. Can also be referred to as "the handfull haymaker, cum crippler, semen slap, or the brick bop."

Dude 1: "holy shit man, did u hear about jacob?"
Dude 2: "uh..no, what's the haps?"
Dude 1: "oh damn, last night he was makin a hot pocket when out of nowhere he gets jizz jacked, it was tight yo!"

Mom: "daaaannny! Did cocoa shit on the carpet agaaain?!"
Son: "yeah..but its totally fine now, that bitch ass mutt got jizz jacked!"

by whack_sauce19 January 29, 2010

Jack Square

Basically a jerk circle in a square formation.

"Damn we don't have enough guys for a jerk circle so i guess we'll just have to do a jack square."

by Mr. Jack Square March 27, 2010

Underwater Jacking

I believe a better term for wanking in the tub would be "Bathturbation"

Last night Dan had a bath and performed Underwater Jacking aka Bathturbation

by lizard_lightning March 21, 2015

Jack Black

An actor who is also in the comedy rock band Tenacious D, which does NOT sing the songs "I'm the Only Gay Eskimo" and "My Biznitch is the Shiznit"!

Corky & The Juice Pigs sing "I'm the Only Gay Eskimo" and Instant Boy Band sings "My Biznitch is the Shiznit".

"Man, Jack Black is awesome in Tenacious D!"
"Yeah, I love 'Gay Eskimo'!"
"You fucktard, they don't sing that song!"

by mystikraven May 13, 2006

Jack Off

Jack Off: When a male masturbates.

Fank is going to jack off in his room.

by ~Keyona January 9, 2004

Jack Brown

the process of placing your lips around ones anus while they fart into your mouth

That rudy poo gave him a jack brown.

by bob solis December 25, 2007

Crack and Jack

When you book a hotel room to spend the night smoking crack and jerking off to pay-per-view porn.

Sorry I'm late for work, I just got off a two-day crack and jack.

by pizzaman724 January 9, 2011