Wanking the dog

To waste time doing something unecessary.

Example: Gary got fired for wanking the dog.

by PotsNPan July 16, 2021

Crazy Wank

The act of viciously masturbating fully naked for over 5 minutes. Throughout the process the subject uses his hand to stroke his penis to near ejaculation, then the subject relaxes for a bit. Then the subject continued to slightly stroke his penis and then he uses a sex toy (store bought or hand made) and places it in a position where it won't move around a lot and the subject viciously fucks the sex toy until near ejaculation. Then the subject is free to experiment with unusual kinds of sexual acts (ex: finger in the bum, other masturbation teqniques, other kinky fetishs). Then once the subject is satisfied withhimself and ready to ejaculate, he must use up the rest of the lube on his penis and hands, and then it is time for the last hurrah. The subject firmly grasps his penis and then he strokes it much faster and harder and it should give the individual a sensation of both mild pain and crazy erotic pleasure. The individual moans to make the procedure much more impactful and when he reaches the climax, the procedure is complete.

Carl: bro I just haven't jacked off at all recently. I'm just not into it anymore

Eddie: last night I had a CRAZY WANK and I will tell you, I changed my life!

by Derkadurr August 5, 2017

Wank-Toss

A word used to show the emotion of "I 100% cannot be fucked with this!"

Josh: " Say Tom, isn't that your girlfriend kissing that guy with one leg? "

Tom " Wank-Toss "

by Simpsy April 16, 2008

Spidey Wank

Wank off the male until they cum and catch as much cum as you can in your hands. State your spidey senses are tingling and fling your arms out in spiderman fashion so impressive "webs" of spunk fling outwards.

I hit his TV and dining table with my Spidey Wank

by LauraLou80 August 3, 2022

Blue Badge Wank

A Blue badge wank is achieved when one goes on to a adult cam site and randomly finds an adult with a disability and engages in mutual masturbation.

Mr Ford drank half a bottle of whiskey last night and had his first blue badge experience.
Or Better known as The Blue Badge Wank

by Dr Form November 1, 2020

Wank nozzle

Wank nozzle, a term used as a synonym for ‘dick’ or ‘dickhead’.

“Ugh that boy is such a wank nozzle”

by PigmentedPlum June 10, 2021

Getting "Wanked"

When you have a friend named "Wanker" and he has a habit of not being around for a period of time. Then out of the blue he just pops up with a wild entrance and suddenly it's a 3 day party. A party you never hate or have a bad time with.

"I planned to get a lot of things done around the house today but all of a sudden I got wanked!"

"I didn't plan on getting "wanked" this past Friday, but 3 days straight later suddenly it was Tuesday"

by anonymous June 29, 2024