Coffee Table

A white girl who has absolutely no ass whatsoever.

So flat, you could put some coffee on it and call it a coffee table

Daamn, that bitch got a coffee table , no ass whatsoever

by MemeLord420/69 March 30, 2016

Table Texting

When people covertly (or not) text message someone in their immediate vicinity because they are lazy, strange, or don't want other people knowing what they're talking about. - Most often noticed occurring in restaurants after the clubs/bars close (like iHop, Denny's, Truck Stop, etc...)

I can't believe Robert is texting that girl sitting across the table from him, instead of just talking to her. But remember, he is the King of Table Texting.

by Towerguy Rob April 27, 2010

table chef

a person who can not order off the menu but feels compeled to rewrite it to their own untrained creations

the table chef on 43 wants gorgonzola sauce with here fish

by clark mcdaniel October 30, 2003

card table

A sexual act involving two men playing cards on a woman's back whilst pummeling her from both ends.

"You fancy getting your wife involved in our little game this weekend. We'll use her as the card table again."

by Jiminy C June 08, 2007

table vac

Someone who snorts drugs.

"Kenny's been using speed again!"
"Yeah, he's becoming a real table vac"

by jormeidt October 05, 2006

hen table

This term was once used by a Newfoundlander in a conversation. He used this term in place of "end table". See example to see the true meaning.

J.P. "Snook, where's your remote?"

Snook "Onda hen table."

J.P. "WHERE?"

Snook "Over onda hen table!"

J.P. "Spell that for me.....hen table???"

Snook "H-E-N table.....hen table."

by KTownFook January 10, 2006

table whore

A person who refuses to acknowledge CSS and uses tables for the entire layout of web sites, rather than for displaying tabular data. Commonly found using heaps of image rollovers, old deprecated tags and sticking to a memorized list of 6 or 7 'web safe' hex colors. Still listens to that shit song by Chumbawamba.

Guy1: When was your site built?
Guy2: Last week, why?
Guy1: LOLWTF it looks like crap.
Guy2: Yeh, my developer is a table whore..

by Random55 December 11, 2008