noun: person: A Jerk-off Jehova Witness is somebody who only texts or calls you when he's jerking off, and doesn't ever want to actually meet. He is annoying and comes a-knocking at the times that are convenient only to them.
Mike only ever calls me when he's jerking off. I offer to make plans so we can both get off, but something always comes up. He's such a jerk-off jehova. aka. a Jerk-Off Jehova Witness
by R. Tizz-E April 09, 2024
A variation of "Joe Schmoe", this term is used for someone who inserts their opinion when not asked. Additionally, this person thinks they know what they're talking about, even though they have no experience or knowledge on most subject being discussed. You might say a Joe Jerk Off is a member of the Peanut Gallery.
Guy #1: Do you hear this guy talking about shit he knows nothing about?
Guy #2: Yeah, he's a real Joe Jerk Off
Guy #2: Yeah, he's a real Joe Jerk Off
by ImAGorilla69 March 16, 2022
A figurative description of an attitude towards life, as well as your immediate and distant surroundings. When you refer to yourself or someone else 'just Jerking off and smoking Newports',, you are simply trying to convey that you/they are not letting anything current issue take their mind off themselves. It is the most self-absorbed and least constructive activity imaginable.
Once I get my pension, I am just gonna retreat to my apartment in Des Moines, and then I'm just gonna jerk off and smoke Newports until Yellowstone does us all in, THAT's my 5-year plan!
I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!
I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!
by how-young-people-talk March 31, 2020
its National jerk your boyfriend off day which means I need to drive over to my boyfriend and use my hands to stroke his dick!
by j_1234567810 June 10, 2024
The act of eating beef jerkey
Jerk off the act of eating beef jerkey
Mom: Son what are you doing
Son: I'm jerking off
Mom: Sounds delicious can I join you?
Mom: Son what are you doing
Son: I'm jerking off
Mom: Sounds delicious can I join you?
by Big Daddy Eater March 04, 2022
Putting one's hand in the shape of a fist, leaving a hole in the middle to place over the male genitals. Once the process begins, rubbing their fist repeatedly in an up and down motion to the point where one begins to ejaculate semen. During this period of time, the constant physical touch brings one sexual please, allowing themself to release any built up tension or stress.
"Oh my god, I really need a nice jerk off session tonight."
"I started jerking off to porn, I came everywhere"
"I started jerking off to porn, I came everywhere"
by wngacc.29 July 08, 2023