The actions of a complete arsehole.
by Dr Womble September 13, 2017
Get the douche manoeuvre mug.There are many kinds of hipster ass thorns: the vegetarian, the vegan, the juice cleanse, the diet, the peanut allergy (I KNOW ITS NOT A CHOICE BUT SHUT UP ABOUT IT ALREADY I DONT NEED TO HEAR ABOUT IT GOD YOURE WORSE THAN THE LACTOSE INTOLERANT GUY!)
However, the gluten douche is arguably the most prominent of the bunch. The gluten douche likes to bombard you with excuse me does this have gluten? Or just asking what’s in something even though gluten douche knows damn well that isn’t gluten free they just want you to list all the things in it so they can interject and tell you how fat and unhealthy you are for even breathing near gluten
However, the gluten douche is arguably the most prominent of the bunch. The gluten douche likes to bombard you with excuse me does this have gluten? Or just asking what’s in something even though gluten douche knows damn well that isn’t gluten free they just want you to list all the things in it so they can interject and tell you how fat and unhealthy you are for even breathing near gluten
Guy 1: “Oh god it’s the gluten douche.”
Guy 2: “ I swear to god if he asks about gluten one more time I’m gonna shove this ‘gluten packed high calorie’ pizza crust down his throat.”
Guy 1: “It’s like we get it you’re healthy shut up!”
Guy 2: “Right?”
Gluten douche: “excuse me, but is that gluten free?”
Guy 1: “you don’t like the crusts right?”
Guy 2: “ I swear to god if he asks about gluten one more time I’m gonna shove this ‘gluten packed high calorie’ pizza crust down his throat.”
Guy 1: “It’s like we get it you’re healthy shut up!”
Guy 2: “Right?”
Gluten douche: “excuse me, but is that gluten free?”
Guy 1: “you don’t like the crusts right?”
by I knew the whole time June 26, 2018
Get the Gluten douche mug.River douche: A person who may or may not live at home with his/her parents, may or may not pay any bills, doesn't have a significant other or children. Spends more money on fishing gear/tackle then he makes.
Fishes his $1200.00 Lamiglass Center pin set up and releases his fish when people are watching, otherwise he is flossing with his ugly stick at the tubes and blowing up small rivers and streams on FB. This "River Douche" also loves to do "how to" videos and tells everyone else in the world how they should fish and/or how they should release them. If you are not running the "River Douche's" favorite, Rod manufacture, Reel Manufacture or Bead Manufactures products, you are much lower than him and you will not catch fish. He and his "posse" do videos, with or without drones, on the rivers and blow great, once unknown, fishing spots up on FB so more "River Douche's" can fish there without putting in the leg work and destroying the fishery with 25 people fishing a 15ft hole.
Also might be a closet homosexual. Probably drives a red truck and is known to be a great dishwasher.
Fishes his $1200.00 Lamiglass Center pin set up and releases his fish when people are watching, otherwise he is flossing with his ugly stick at the tubes and blowing up small rivers and streams on FB. This "River Douche" also loves to do "how to" videos and tells everyone else in the world how they should fish and/or how they should release them. If you are not running the "River Douche's" favorite, Rod manufacture, Reel Manufacture or Bead Manufactures products, you are much lower than him and you will not catch fish. He and his "posse" do videos, with or without drones, on the rivers and blow great, once unknown, fishing spots up on FB so more "River Douche's" can fish there without putting in the leg work and destroying the fishery with 25 people fishing a 15ft hole.
Also might be a closet homosexual. Probably drives a red truck and is known to be a great dishwasher.
Hey John, did you see that River Douche blow up, said river on FB? He was so proud of that 7lb steelhead that he had to take a photo and not hide the background. He is quite the River Douche.
by Reel Truth October 9, 2019
Get the river douche mug.by Duncan Cromartie June 14, 2018
Get the douche beggar mug.Noun: Injury sustained from excessive douche exposure
Adjective: The quality of being massively douchey
Adjective: The quality of being massively douchey
"I ended up talking for a half hour to some guy with too much hair gel and a screen-printed dress shirt. I have a nasty douche-bruise."
"David? Total Douchebruise."
"David? Total Douchebruise."
by IDidItFirst! October 16, 2011
Get the Douche-bruise mug.A Douche wanderer, or conversely stated, a wandering douche, is a specific type of d-bag that interjects to make a snide douchy comment that's most likely malicious, and, most importantly, this douche is often a complete stranger or not engrossed in the conversation.
I was skating yesterday and not landing many tricks when a douche wanderer approached me and remarked "nice moves" then walked away snidely laughing aloud.
by Ridiculon May 31, 2009
Get the Douche Wanderer mug.by Elmo Swag July 3, 2011
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