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Boner Texting

The act of texting a hot woman while in possession of a raging boner in hopes of getting her to come over and take care of it. Is frequently triggered by watching porn and ends abruptly once the person in possesion of said boner has blown his load (usually by means of his own hand)
Oh man, I really gotta quit boner texting hailey everytime I watch an Alexis Texas video.
by Juscallmecaptain March 11, 2009
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boner sandwich

What you say when something bad, annoying, or disappointing happens. Basically the same as "that sucks" or "too bad."
person1: I tried to call him, but he wasn't home :(
person2: Boner sandwich.
by bandcampgirl183 September 26, 2005
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clam boner

A clitoral erection and the heightened horniness of a female after the consumption of two or more alcoholic drinks.
I'm getting tipsy, I feel a clam boner comin' on!
by The Great Applebottom December 26, 2008
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stealth boner

Similar to a stealth bomber, this is when a male attempts to hide his erection from others. Depending on the intensity of the erection, the size of the male's penis, and the clothes he is wearing, the male may go about a stealth boner in several ways:the most common is to stick his penis upwardly flat against his abdomen using his pants to hold it down. If the erection is only mild in intensity, he may try and hold the erection against his thigh in his pant leg. Attempting to have a stealth boner is exponentially more difficult whilst wearing gym shorts and/or no shirt. Most men grow increasingly adept at using stealth boners since the onset of puberty.
Mike 2: Dude I gotta go talk to one of the director's but that hot audit chick gave me a raging stiffy...what do I do???
Mike 1: Just walk in with a stealth boner dumbass!
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joke boner

When you laugh so hard you get a boner.
Colin's joke about Mexicans gave me a joke boner
by Jard S January 19, 2016
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Boner basher

1) an individual or animal who interrupts your wank sesh causing you to become flacid
2) an unfortunate event that rewins you're awesome plans or bad ass current situation inturn making it negative or ending it altogether
1) My dog can be a real boner basher, I was mid way through flogging the log and it was becoming nice and stiff untill my dog ran into the sliding glass door startling me .

2) my bother is a real boner basher, I was 3rd gear pinned doing a hill climb on my yfs 200 and I get a call his truck crapped out and needs a tow
by beaner master98 September 12, 2016
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Boner TV

The use of advanced GoPro technology to place a small yet durable HD camera into the eye of the penis, so as to see as the dick does.
I titty fucked Amanda and got a sweet view of those fun bags by using Boner TV!
by etphone home April 11, 2014
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