Apple Boner 

What you get when you are subscribe (usually blindly) to all products Apple, while at the same time being completely dismissive of any competition (no matter how superior). This usually involves blind allegiance to any new Apple product or release regardless of the exorbitant sticker price.

"My apple boner was raging when I heard about ios5, but went down to half-mast when I learned of Steve Jobs' death"

"I totally got an Apple boner for the Ipad even though it's basically an over-sized Ipod Touch."

Apple Boner by StinkyCologne October 18, 2011

Squirm Boner 

When an erection occurs involuntarily in response to an inappropriate stimulus and a conflict between logic and biologic arises resulting in a state of terror, embarrassment or squirmyness.

This condition arises predominantly in situations where the catalyst is vile, repulsive or undesirable and against all better judgement, you get an erection.

A Squirm Boner occurs when:

A nasty trailer trash dance-queen drunk on lady's night well-drinks uses a fist of sausage fingers to grope your junk on the dance floor.

When you realize the sexy asian girl you are fapping to is actually a boy

when your cousin is forced to sit on your lap in the back seat of your dads car while driving on a bumpy road.

When you accidently brush up against a 90 year old woman in a swimming pool.

Squirm Boner by eats tribbles October 20, 2011

murder boner 

Etymology of the word Murderboner: The name dates back to circa 800 AD when hoards of Vikings pillaged new lands. Observers of Viking raids told huge erections achieved by the warriors after killing a victim.

Alternative meaning: what your dick looks like after having sex with a girl on her period.

As he pulls out... he looks down and sees blood, SHIT Murder boner.

murder boner by Tonto_89 September 18, 2016

depression boner 

Depression boner, is when you have a boner because of an even that makes you sad but in response it gives you a raging boner

For example tanner has gotten the biggest depression boner of his life because his poor pooch has been killed

depression boner by tanner the poor pooch March 21, 2017

Lonely boner 

"Lonely Boner" refers to a virgin or someone who has been without sexual activity for a long time.

My friend Derrick is a lonely boner, or my brother Chad has a lonely boner.

Lonely boner by Rufus T (for Tucker) December 19, 2008

The Boner Song 

A great song by the Whitest Kids U' Know singing about how hard, how weird, and what you must never do with a boner, including, but not limited to: Trimming the hedges (with the hedge trimmer pointed down).

Beginning of The Boner Song (I won't ruin it for you. Look it up on YouTube)

Click, click, click...

It's hard to go work with a, BONER.
It's hard to drive a car with a, BONER.
It's hard to mow the lawn with a, BONER.
It's hard to go to sleep with a, BONER.

Now go watch the rest of the video. Seriously.

The Boner Song by Mr.Sacman March 16, 2009

Purple Boner 

Where a male is subjected to extreme arousal far exceeding the point of "blue balls" syndrome.

Guy1 - "Dude, I was trying to have sex with my new girlfriend last night, and instead I got blue balls."

Guy2 - "You think that's bad, I got a purple boner just watching you both through the window."

Example 2: "Hey Mom, tell grandma to stop wearing that dress. She is giving me a "Purple Boner."

Purple Boner by Raging Wop July 5, 2010