Samson

Biblical series! It's the thing! It's time for the thing! The thing I was doing from before. The Biblical series.

God "Heyheyhey, check it it out. Check out that guy over there."

Lucifer 😑 "Another boat guy? What is wrong with-"

Philistine "AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!" *THUD*

Lucifer "HOLY SHIT!"

God "Yeah! Right!?"

Lucifer "He threw that guy, like, 40 feet in the air! I mean... I could throw a guy higher than that but they don't do that! What the hell did you do!?"

God "I made a deal."

Lucifer "A deal? A deal for what?"

God "Well.. I give him super strength... And HE... Grows his hair out."

Lucifer 😟 "What could you possibly have to gain from him growing out his fucking- Jesus, he is mangling those fucking guys..."

God "No, Jesus was the me-guy this is Samson- Wait... Is that... Yet? Where ARE we, like, chronologically speaking?" 🤔

Lucifer "What IS that in his hand!?"

God "Donkey jaw."

Lucifer "The JAW of a donkey?"

God "Yup."

Lucifer 😨 "Did he mutilate a donkey just to do that!? Who is that for!?"

God 🤷 ♂️ "I donno. It's a good weapon I guess."

Lucifer "IT ISN'T THAT, THOUGH! IT ISN'T! It can't possibly BE that! AT ALL!"

God "I mean, he's killed like 784 guys with it already so... Ya know... It's hard to say isn't a good weapon..."

Lucifer 😑 "Say that you genuinely believe a donkey jaw is a good weapon. Say it out loud."

God "Well... Yeah... The super strength is probably doing a lot of the legwork... But he's having fun. And that's what counts."

Lucifer "Pffft! Hahahahaha! That is stupid. This is fucking stupid. I'm done. This is dumb."

God "What? Where are you... *sigh* Well I think it's cool... Kachow! Kachow! Jaw-stab! Kachow! Super jaw-stab! Heheheheheh..."

by Hym Iam January 7, 2024

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Samson

Samson is the best person you could ever meet, he's warm as the sun, as silly as fun, as cool as a tree, as scary as the sea, as hot as fire, cold as ice, Sweet as sugar and everything nice. Irrespective of your gender, you'd instantly fall in love with his personality. He is the best human.

Oh, you mean David?, he's a Samson for sure!

by dangerousdaddy420 March 16, 2024

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Samson

An empowered black man is not afraid to take risks, even if it takes them into unknown territory. A strong man that is destined for greatest. He’s smart, funny, sweet and most importantly, gives you love like no other. A business man that knows exactly what he wants out of life. He’s unmatched in the bedroom and can make you laugh whenever you’re having a bad day. He can make your heart skip a beat and make you trip over your words. He challenges you and actually teaches you a lot. The best person you could ever meet. You ever meet a Samson, you keep them.

If I had to be with someone, it would be Samson.

by GoddessLoveAura March 18, 2024

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Samson

Samson is a good friend, partner, and son. he’s also a fun person to be around! Samson is also a very honest guy and he’s the most handsomest guy in the world. if you ever see a Samson grab him before someone else does!

i wanna work with NONCHALANT Samson !!!

by 𝓻𝓸𝓫𝓵𝓸𝔁𝓼𝓮𝔁𝓰𝓸𝓭 June 10, 2024

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