randy johnson

the new york yankees pitcher, also the funniest name alive because it means horny penis.

i have a randy johnson

by phlip5907 November 28, 2006

Jerk Johnson

Sex Act - verb - To lick a girl from bellybutton to tramp stamp in a single fluid motion.

Swish: Did you get magnanimous on that hottie you left the bar with last night?

Jerk: Oh yeah, I Jerk Johnsoned the shit out of her... ugh ugh ugh. (In the style of Will Ferrel in Wedding Crashers)

by Big Swish October 4, 2008

Woody Johnson

Is not meant here to be a person's actual name, rather, Woody Johnson, describes a hard penis, or a man who has one.

Foxy Chick: Damn! John Doe started taking Viagra last month. Yesterday he was "Woody Johnson" for about 3 and a half hours. We both came at least 6 times!

by Annie Johnson June 11, 2006

Johnson Condo

men's pants

Honey can you get the grass stains out of my johnson condo.

by terrifyer08 August 24, 2010

Tommy Johnson

A convicted war criminal from 2005 who killed seventeen people with chlorine gas after his wife left him.

Tommy Johnson : "I have something really cool, you guys should come and take a look."
17 People in 2005 : "Oh boy I can't wait to see this"

by Kajus Vaicuis April 22, 2021

Tactical Johnson

A military grade penis.

She seems like the type of girl to need a Tactical Johnson after tonight.

by ebertalo February 3, 2020

Bonjour Johnson

Former teammate of #1 12 year-old in the nation Demekquatre. Now has beef with him.

Guy: Yo bro I heard Bonjour Johnson and Demekquatre are no longer teammates.
Other Guy: Yeah, I heard they beefin' now.

by seditious libel April 30, 2023