You couldn't take an educated shit!

When someone with very little knowledge on the subject matter tries to come up with a hypothesis but really doesn't know jack crap.

Originally used in the Tourettes Guy video "Buried Alive" (December 25, 2020), with one of the skits being Tourettes Guy and his son trying to fix a broken washing machine.

Tourettes Guy: "Damn it! The repairman will probably charge me $50 just to look at it!"

Son: "Well, maybe, uhh... maybe I can take a look at it."

Tourettes Guy: "WHAT"

His Son: "Maybe I can have a look at it."

Tourettes Guy: "You don't know how a washing machine works!... How're you gonna figure out why it won't start?"

His Son: "Well, uh... I could take an educated guess."

Tourettes Guy: "YOU COULDN'T TAKE AN EDUCATED SHIT!"

by pizzapasta_mcguiness March 13, 2023

If penises could walk

An expression used to describe situations in which the aforementioned event could never occur, ie. something that is very, very, very, very unlikely to happen.

If penises could walk, I could get laid every night this week.

by PeppersandBrilaina123 October 3, 2016

Shit so thick you could stir it with a stick

When you’ve had a particularly hard day, and the problems are getting to you; a lot of problems.

Coined by R.E.M. in the song “Bad Day”.

“Dude, my day’s been so rough. I’ve got shit so thick you could stir it with a stick.”

by MaybeARealWord March 30, 2021

I'm bored and I really want to make a long defenition that could break a world record and thats really funny and not just W spam.

I'm bored and I really want to make a long defenition that could break a world record and thats really funny and not just W spam.

this means I'm bored and I really want to make a long defenition that could break a world record and thats really funny and not just W spam.

I'm bored and I really want to make a long defenition that could break a world record and thats really funny and not just W spam.

ok

by a sussy meaning guy thing July 4, 2022

Reading? I didn't know you could read.

The sentence Draco Malfoy says to one of his goons (that is actually Harry in disguise) when he see that he is wearing glasses

Person one: "Why are you wearing glasses?"

Person two: "Uh. Reading?"

Person one: "Reading? I didn't know you could read." *Looks kinda impressed*

by Clara Winters July 17, 2022

Get the get the get the get the get the get a mug mug get the mug BRO YOUR 50 YEARS OLD AND YOU COULDN'T PICK PARSLEY!

Get the get the get the get the get the get a mug mug get the mug BRO YOUR 50 YEARS OLD AND YOU COULDN'T PICK PARSLEY! Vinny vs Raj slamdown and other random shite.

Get the get the get the get the get the get a mug mug get the mug BRO YOUR 50 YEARS OLD AND YOU COULDN'T PICK PARSLEY!

Ahhhhhhhh okkaayyyyyyy?????

by Skyrim550 April 15, 2022

he could work for BP

Used to describe someone who makes a snafu out of something deceptively simple. Refers to the 2010 BP oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico. Can also be used in the feminine sense, as in "she could work for BP."

Dave: "Did you see Robert Green fuck up that easy save that could have won the game for England?"
Ralph: "That was devastating. He should have had that damn ball!"
Dave: "Hell, if he keeps playing that badly, he could work for BP!"

Sarah: "Oh, I cannot fucking BELIEVE Kimberly! How could she fuck up my order?"
Amber: "I know. She could work for BP."

by yugiohfan2010 June 19, 2010