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Conkers

Another form of Crazy

Also worth mentioning Conker the Squirrel.
Dan: Hey, did you hear about the lacrosse game? USA beat England.

John: No way! That's Conkers!
by Testi-clese June 29, 2023
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Man conkers

A gentleman's game played indoors in front of an open fire. The aim of the game is to bring your opponent to his knees by bombarding his scrotum with a series of wrecking ball blows using only your own scrotum and the power of your pelvic thrust.

Equipment required:

A good sized-pair of man conkers (shaven in professional matches or unshaven for amateur duelling).

The koteka (approved by the Chief Umpire in all competitions or at the discretion of opponents in non-competitive matches).

Rules of the game

The game will commence with a toss, the winner of the toss may elect to strike or receive.

Each player then takes three alternate strikes at the opponent's conkers.

Each attempted strike must be clearly aimed at the nut, no deliberate mis-hits.

The game will be decided once one of the conkers is smashed.

A small piece of nut or skin remaining shall be judged out, it must be enough to mount an attack.

If both nuts smash at the same time then the match shall be replayed.

A player causing a knotting of the man conkers (a snag) will be noted, three snags will lead to disqualification.
"I do enjoy a ruddy good game of man conkers," said Gerald as he reigned several blows upon Rupert's already tender scrotum.
by Gerald Crich November 8, 2013
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Related Words
conk conkers conky conklin conked conkey conkasa Conkers Deep Conkie conked out

butt conker

When lots of cleg nuts join together to form one giant cleg nut, or a butt conker.
Lily: Oh man, my cleg nut has grown so large it's practically a butt conker!
by ConkertheButt May 13, 2016
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boofing conkers

someone that inserts chestnuts, also known as conkers in the UK into their anal cavity for sexual pleasure
Hey Carlos, areyou boofing conkers again or why are you acting so strange?
by SkyNexus February 3, 2023
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Bashing open a conker

Ay yo, I was bashing open a conker earlier
by BigBoyChungus777 September 18, 2020
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Conkie

aka Conkey/Conky.
when a Cow and a monkey mate, and have a baby.
The results end in a Conkey/Conkie; half cow, half monkey.

Also a sex position: your doing a girl from behind while shes eating grass, you beat on your chest like a monkey
Look at that Conkie over there!
Im going to Conkie that hoe.
by RSaxaphone June 5, 2008
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conkey

A derogatory term for a Caucasian person and more specifically, an extremely pale, awkward, and assertively uncool white male whose typical dress consists of various Hard Rock Cafe t-shirts, short shorts, and white athletic shoes with tube socks. Can be used as a term of endearment between Caucasian males.
"Look at that conkey motherfucker putting ketchup on his sushi."

The group of African American men were approached by a grade-A conkey, who proceeded to awkwardly expound upon his "down-ness" with the Civil Rights Movement.
by onefaka December 14, 2010
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