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hoboken squat cobbler

A fetish involving watching someone sitting their posterior into a pie (preferably apple or pumpkin, but this is up to the fetishist) and wiggling said buttocks around in the aforementioned dessert
Jimmy: Yo, did you catch that Hoboken Squat Cobbler video on the Tube?

Chuck: Yeah man, got me rock hard
by cellophanefriend September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

The act of sitting in a pie (whilst clothed or unclothed) in a manner to arouse or stimulate pleasure.
(first seen in Better Call Saul)
James: Man, Dan is a pretty good Squat Cobbler, but sometimes he cries when he does it.
by AttackOnPoke July 27, 2016
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squat cobbler

When one squats to rub his bottom in an actually pie
that squat cobbler cream pied his own ass, literally.
by Zowi320 September 3, 2016
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Nut Cobbler

The act of stretching a large ballsack over one's entire face. (double points if they make fart noises with it)
Girl 1: I heard you had a good time with Guy last night!
Girl 2: Yeah, I started off with some top. He gave be a good nut cobbler, and then he finished.
by CobbleringKid May 6, 2021
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squat cobbler

process of planting ones ass on a pie for sexual release
Andrew is a squat cobbler, it gets him off.
by The Glinch September 3, 2016
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squat cobbler

A type of fetish video, where in the performer remains fully clothed, and proceeds to sit in and consume pies of various flavors. As defined in the TV show Better Call Saul
That guy is a Squat cobbler
I love a good SQ flick
Anyone down to Squat on some Cobbler
by Ryan_Payne September 2, 2016
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Hoboken Squat Cobbler

When a fully clothed person sits in a pie (or other cake like pastry) and commences to weep like a little girl. Squat Cobblering is usually engaged in by ugly, bald, middle aged men, who usually have some form of what appears to be mild autism. Said mild autism may manifest itself in an childlike, irrational and downright creepy obsession with baseball cards.
Did you see the back of his pants? He either crapped'em, or Hoboken Squat Cobbler'd a chocolate cake.
by Bob Barr 123 August 28, 2016
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