Sprinkler Dick

When you take your first piss after blowing a load. The way the stream spits all over the place in every direction.

Jess: Mike, what the hell happened to the bathroom? Did you get drunk and pee everywhere?

Mike: No man. I was up all night banging Miss Perfect Tits. I woke up this morning to take a piss and had a major case of sprinkler dick.

by RJH2 December 3, 2016

Dick for daycare

When you're with a chick that's crazy, but she watches your kid while you're at work. The sex is great, so you don't feel the need to go to your backup plan just yet.

Similar to a Bangmaid

Guy 1- "Why are you still with that crazy bitch?"
Guy 2-"She's cheaper than a babysitter"
Guy 1- "So it's a dick for daycare situation?"
Guy 2- "Pretty much"

by Roscoe Moist December 3, 2016

dick dogged

When u get fucked over especially by athorities

Bro i got pulled over doing 100 in 30 and the cop totally dick dogged me.

by Findarr January 10, 2017

Dick minutes

Time spent balls deep.

We spent 8 hours together, but I only logged about 22 dick minutes.

by Dickminutes24/7 November 20, 2015

Dick Move

When your company sends you an email letting you know you can save $50 a month if you turn in a form from your doctor to the HR department on Monday. But sends you the email on Friday.

Dear valued employee, You can save $50 per month on your health insurance with our company if you send in the attached biometeric form filled out by your doctor by the deadline below. (Deadline is less than one business day from the date the letter was sent out. ) Signed, Your employer, Dick Move.

by vudukungfu December 22, 2015

dick welfare

Giving dick to someone who hasn't had any in a long time because they need it.

Bro 1 : "Ay yo this some bullshit, government need to put me on some fucking dick welfare."

Bro 2 : "Damn bro. It's been that long for ya? I can get you a fix."

by Barack Obama's Cousin November 13, 2018

Flaming Dick

When you coat your dick in hand sanitizer and light it on fire. You the proceed to fuck a woman and cum before it goes out or burns the dick off.

I did a flaming dick to this bitch last night and lost my right nut. Still had a blast tho!

by Biggie dick November 30, 2018