Paddle Disease

An addiction that hits members of highly active kayak and canoe clubs. Strong social ties combine with adrenaline and endorphins, released of the physical activity, to create an addiction-like state. The paddler will lose interest in other activities such as work, house-cleaning and sometimes even non-paddling friends and family members. Seriously diseased paddlers will often make excuses for even more aggressively dysfunctional members of their circle, especially leaders, rather than risk being cast out or walking away, and losing paddle buddies.

1. Dennis missed the opportunity to be at his mother's bedside when she passed away because of Paddle Disease; the Plateau got an inch and a half of rain and while his mom might be up for two more days, the creeks wouldn't.

2. If it weren't for Paddle Disease, she would have walked away from John long before he slept with those 3 other women on last weekend's canoe camping trip.

by NashDiggity February 8, 2012

paddle sock

Any tubular cover made of fleece to fit over a canoe or kayak paddle to protect the paddle from harm. Invented in 1981 by Jill Ellis.

Wrap your stick with a paddle sock.

by Fionatheknowitall July 4, 2011

Snap Paddling

The act of desperately searching through your Snapchat in hopes you can find someone that will send you explicit photos.

“Yo! I was Snap Paddling the other day.”

“You find anyone?”
“You get anything?”
“No....”

by Steven dickerson November 17, 2018

paddle swatcher

Flat landers or city folks going north to go tubing, kayaking or canoeing down rivers and have no idea what their doing.

Look at them fucking paddle swatchers going in circles around the pond.

by Jayr39 July 21, 2017

paddle pilot

A video game player that only plays on game consoles such as Nintendo, PlayStation, Xbox. They are typically considered a lower caste of game players who know little about anything other than the games they play. All consoles have controllers that resemble some shape of paddle

"Hey did you ask James how much framerate his game rig needs to run the new Call of Duty? " "Naw, he's just a paddle pilot, and wouldn't understand"

by Oregonian_Son August 31, 2017

the texas paddle

You technically hit a kid in the face with a 20 ounce steak

" come'eer you son of a bitch your getting the texas paddle".

by pocket pussy frank June 18, 2018

sissy paddle

Another name for a kick board in swimming. This term is usually used by more experienced swimmers to tease less skilful swimmers.

Also known as:
Bitch Board
Pansy Paddle

“Hey! I just got the sissy paddles for the newbies.”

by Lupoleopard August 13, 2018