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Narcissist Jesus

A religious person who only follows what they believe in when it benefits them or gives them attention, all done while being a text book Narcissist, as well as 2 faced.
"They always act so holy in church for the attention, what a Narcissist Jesus."
by JJJamasone July 25, 2021
mugGet the Narcissist Jesusmug.

Jesus Fatigue

The mis-spelling of "Je suis fatigué" Also means that you are so tired, you turn into Jesus.
"I have jesus fatigue..."

"Jesus Fatigue..." "Quoi???" "Désolé, *Je suis fatigué"
by LogLegoMan21 May 24, 2019
mugGet the Jesus Fatiguemug.

Sexy Jesus

When people are actually attracted to Jesus because of his handsome appearance.

Ironically, Jesus wasn't actually all that good looking according to the bible:

"He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him."-Isaiah 53:2
Most people seem to be attracted to Sexy Jesus when in reality Jesus wasn't all that beautiful
by Nordicdragon June 27, 2018
mugGet the Sexy Jesusmug.

#jesus boner

When you want to get up in there...but you are too wasted. You pray to Jesus to give you a massive boner.
"I'm tweeting Jesus for a #Jesus Boner. Please give me the strength to fuck the chick/dude."
by TheBonePolice January 9, 2019
mugGet the #jesus bonermug.

Cabbage jesus

A overweight cunt who is full of life and loves to joke around with anyone. He loves to make friends and will even share his lunch with you. He will go out of his way for anyone!
Bro 1: did u just see that guy? he just gave the homeless family 100 dollars!
Bro 2: yeah! he always does that his name is cabbage jesus..
Bro 1: what a mad cunt we should meet him sometime..

Bro 2: hell yeah!
by Cabbage jesus May 12, 2019
mugGet the Cabbage jesusmug.

Jesus Preschool

The stereotypical, faith-filled pre-elementary school that most small town children went to, typically held in a church basement. Includes cheese balls, prayer before snack, and 100 toddlers singing "Away in a Manger" for the yearly Christmas performance. Not limited to Protestant (Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, etc.) and Catholic locations.
Oh my gosh, you went to Jesus Preschool? So did I! Did you say *insert rhyming prayer here*, too?!
by maybelatergater September 5, 2016
mugGet the Jesus Preschoolmug.

blasian jesus

Black Asian that is very kind but is very dirty
by Annoying 101 March 29, 2017
mugGet the blasian jesusmug.

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