Phone captain

Someone who's your good friend/best friend on the phone, but can't be bothered meeting up face to face to chill or have tea/coffee together.

Pretty much anyone, anyone that's a good friend on the phone, but cbf/is not interested in catching up face to face.

George: Hey Mike, I spoke to Tony on the phone, he often sounds like a good friend, but yet either can't be bothered catching up or else keeps lying to me that we'll catch up face to face?

Mike: Dude, that's a "phone captain".

George: What's a phone captain?

Mike: Like "keyboard warrior", except much nicer of course!

by Fair Care - Care Fair :) October 12, 2016

gaff phone

A concoction of alcoholic beverages transferred into an empty 2L bottle of some sort and shared amongst a group of people leaving a house "gaff" party en route to a nightclub.

The name originates from North County Dublin, the bottle resembles a house phone, & everyone always wants to use the gaff phone!

Who wants to use the gaff phone?

Giz a shot of the gaff phone?

Who's next on the gaff phone?

by MalletMan December 13, 2016

Phone Hawk

That's teacher/professor, who's always trying to catch you on your phone to either:
-Embarass you

-relieve you of your phone

-to hack and get on your SnapChat story

These teachers are relentless in their efforts, whether they show it/admit to it or not. They are also typically nearing the end of their careers and want to have some fun by taking kids' phones and holding it ransom while all the other students laugh and make fun of you because of how much of a sherm you are for getting it taken. These students can receive their phones after a well planned and thought out essay describing and emphasizing their weaknesses and deepest secrets. Then are shamed once again by being forced to read said essay in front of the class the next day. These essays are about 2000 words long.

Phone hawks will burn in hell.

"Mr. Johns is such a Phone Hawk bro, I can't even text my mom!"

"Ms. Everett is such a Phone Hawk! She made a kid cry after she took his phone!"

by benbeast1210 December 14, 2016

smart phone dump

Using smart while moving your bowels causing you to spend longer that required squating on the turd catcher

I took a smart phone dump earler , took me two hours to realise i only had to piss

by Joe O'Regan November 24, 2015

phone call-ision

When you try to call somebody, but the person is also trying to call you at the exact same time, so both of you get the busy signal.

Ferdinand: 'I called you 3 times this morning, but every time I got the busy signal.'
Jack: 'But I didn't talk to anyone on the phone today! I tried to call you, too, but all I got was the busy signal.'
Jack and Ferdinand: 'Phone call-ision!'

by SocialistElephant January 10, 2016

phone girlfriend

A girl that you are only friends with over the phone cause you are too nerdy in real life.

My phone girlfriend said she had to go cause her brother was there to fix her plumbing.

by Dr. Doom J.M.D January 30, 2016

wifi phone

A phone without service that you can only use with wifi.

Girl she got a wifi phone cause when she came to my house she kept asking for my password cause she couldnt text nobody without wifi.

by Jayyy02 March 7, 2016