Granola lady

Someone who is very plane

yo moma is a granola lady

by mr mayonase January 4, 2012

Granola bars

What C2s create friendships in order to get.

Person 1 Why does my friend keep stealing my granola bars??

Person 2: Because she's a C2!

by THE REAL MAYO MAN April 21, 2021

Granola-bar

A granola-bar is used to make friendships with any and all C2s. Just make sure you keep bringing granola bars with you (as many as you can), and don't think that fruit-snacks can be used as a permanent substitute.

C2: Now, I brought you all here because you have been giving me fruit snacks instead of granola-bars.
Persons 5, 6 and 8: We thought that fruitsnacks were ok to be used.
C2: NO! Now, you better all have granola-bars
Persons 5, 6 and 8:

by THE REAL MAYO MAN April 14, 2021

Granola Bars

Granola Bars are food-like items used to create friendships with C2s. More powerful than any fruit snacks.

C2: Want to be friends?

Person 67493J: Sure

C2: ...

Person 67493J: ...

C2: Where... Where are the Granola Bars?

by THE REAL MAYO MAN April 25, 2021

Granola

A “ Granola” can be described as a Vegan, Organic, Non-GMO, BPA-Free, Grass Fed, Grass Finished, Dairy Free, Nut Free, Soy Free, Lemon Wedge Deodorant wearing overly environmentally friendly non-hippy-but-also-a-hippy-at-the-same time stereotype (Think hippy minus the drugs and the tie dye.) Granolas often smell like curry and likely live in an off-the-grid tiny house in the middle of some field they probably don’t actually own. In said tiny houses in an effort to save the climate, they likely redirect their “all natural toilet waste” from their glorified port-a-potty into their veggie compost to later use as “natural” fertilizer. Granolas often dress in an outdoorsy fashion that also resembles that of a well dressed hobo. It is not uncommon to identify a Granola wearing Birkenstocks, Athletic Shorts, Camel Back backpacks, North Face Jackets, and more regardless of whether or not they take frequent hikes. Granolas may also be seen driving a Subaru Outback with several decals on the back windshield that often refer to climate change and world peace.

I love Jan but after her month long getaway in the deep woods of the Rocky Mountains, she turned into a total granola!

by NoboHobo January 19, 2022

granola

a heterosexual white man that finishes after a singular stroke because of his built up testosterone from watching anime porn, usually named some basic shit like will or jackson

hook ups with frat boys are granola as fuck

by akhxloqnx July 10, 2022

human granola

Kara Hoffman- the biggest granola eating machine in the North West.

A human granola is person that typically drives a Subaru, goes on hikes, eats Clif Bars and a ton of granola...

Sheesh, Kara is such a human granola, look at her wearing those Birkenstocks, eating her organic yogurt and granola!

by Bbjkhdjkgklggkdlkgddffd454545b February 27, 2017