The Infinite Monkey Theorem

Everything that can happen, will happen, given enough time.

A: Did you hear? The Patriots came back from a 25 point deficit to win the Superbowl!
B: Wow, that's like stuff from the Infinite Monkey Theorem.

by Azshara October 7, 2020

Ricky's Theorem

When all else fails, just c.out the answer.

Question: Sort the following array : 5,3,2,4,1.
Ricky: "Fuck, I can't figure it out. I will use Ricky's Theorem."
*c.out << 1,2,3,4,5
*submit

by JohnnyWong August 19, 2013

Akehoshi Subaru Theorem

The Akehoshi Subaru Theorem states when one feels the whims of gacha due to an underlying feeling of fondness for said character (not including applications regarding “meta” reasons) one may utilize that in priority of gacha decision.

“man i really want to get childe because i like him but i dont think he’ll fit into any of my teams”
“nah man the akehoshi subaru theorem says you should get him if you like him”

by boopsae October 11, 2023

Daniel Theorem

A theorem that states that occams razor can be applied in any situation a person sees fit. The most common use of the Daniel Theorem is in math, where if a pattern or shortcut appears, one could deduct the answer from either logic or simple reasoning. Daniel Theorem is a phenomenon but can also be a way of life, if there is a loophole in not paying taxes, then one should apply it.

Using the Daniel Theorem, I realized that a circle is better than a square to make car wheels, take that libs!

by DanielAlmighty January 17, 2024

The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem

The theory that all male-identifying individuals can be categorized as either a pirate, a cowboy, or an astronaut. Some combination thereof is a possibility, but one classification is always dominant. The categories need no defined criteria because the correct placement is almost always surprisingly obvious.

"I really like him, which is surprising because based on The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem he's more of an astronaut, and I'm usually more attracted to pirate men."
"I get that. I'm mostly into cowboys at the moment, but I could definitely see myself settling down with an astronaut one day."

by hannahmadison69 January 19, 2024

Grumulum's Theorem

When you don't know what you're doing, but you get it right anyway.

A: How did you get the correct answer on this test when you're failing the class?
B: I just used Grumulum's Theorem.

by RealCraigles January 25, 2024

The Hitler Theorem

The Hitler Theorem is in relation to how a stimulus affects you negatively day by day more than Adolf Hitler does. If something affects you worse than Adolf Hitler, then The Hitler Theorem can prove objectively that the stimulus is worse than Adolf Hitler.

"I'm tired of all this work my teacher is assigning me! It annoys me more than Adolf Hitler does, therefore according to The Hitler Theorem this homework is worse than Adolf Hitler!"

by Theoremist November 22, 2023