A guy who is designated by his friend to have sex with, or pipe out, his girl while he is unable to do so.
Harry: "Hey Jack! Will you be my pipe captain while I am away this weekend?"
Jack: "I would be honored!"
Jack: "I would be honored!"
by Johnny_whitestream November 10, 2016

one who likes to wreck and break things smash and crash usually someone that is a know it all and can not be told anything
by tbrutal March 15, 2009

The oudacious and drunken act of inserting ones hand down the back of a womans jeans, in an attempt to reach around and grab the crotch. Only applicable to woman who are strangers.
So my buddy just reached down the back of that 40 year olds pants when she was leaning forward at the bar and gave her the Captains Handshake!
by Jeff Steves June 28, 2011

by Captain Lawlipopz October 29, 2008

by Harry Fucker June 2, 2005

The Nintendoverse's sexually deprived Chuck Norris.
He has a finishing move called the Falcon punch that pretty much matches Chuck Norris's legendary fist. If two Falcon Punches should ever collide, the universe would divide itself by 0 and... well we'd all be dead. To perform a falcon punch, you must get a glove, set your hand on fire, wait 1 FULL second, then punch someone in the face.
How is he sexually deprived? If you play him in any of the Super Smash Bros series and press up + B near an unsuspecting opponent, you'll see why. He wraps his arms and one leg around them, which is followed by a pelvic thrust (oh so what did you think he was doing?) and him saying "Yes". The outcome is the opponent gets burned in a fiery orgasmic flame, and is dealt damage. Usually the opponent goes off-screen and dies (because they're so embarrassed). This is usually followed by Cpt. Falcon saying "Show me ya moves!", adding insult to injury.
His down + b maneuver is called Falcon kick, which he only uses when he gets a kick to the leg ("Fuckin' kick" he says fast, but it sounds like it's a falcon move).
Other than that, he has many other maneuvers which usually result in the opponent getting minor burns (Falcon knee)
He has a finishing move called the Falcon punch that pretty much matches Chuck Norris's legendary fist. If two Falcon Punches should ever collide, the universe would divide itself by 0 and... well we'd all be dead. To perform a falcon punch, you must get a glove, set your hand on fire, wait 1 FULL second, then punch someone in the face.
How is he sexually deprived? If you play him in any of the Super Smash Bros series and press up + B near an unsuspecting opponent, you'll see why. He wraps his arms and one leg around them, which is followed by a pelvic thrust (oh so what did you think he was doing?) and him saying "Yes". The outcome is the opponent gets burned in a fiery orgasmic flame, and is dealt damage. Usually the opponent goes off-screen and dies (because they're so embarrassed). This is usually followed by Cpt. Falcon saying "Show me ya moves!", adding insult to injury.
His down + b maneuver is called Falcon kick, which he only uses when he gets a kick to the leg ("Fuckin' kick" he says fast, but it sounds like it's a falcon move).
Other than that, he has many other maneuvers which usually result in the opponent getting minor burns (Falcon knee)
Captain Falcon meets Chuck Norris
Captain Falcon: "Show me ya moves"
*Chuck Norris inches Cpt. Falcon's way and kicks him in the leg, dealing 10% damage to Cpt. Falcon*
*Cpt. Falcon is hurting so he Effin' kicks Norris, dealing 15% damage to Norris*
*Both charge up their power punches, both punches collide... Unfortunately, a norris punch doesn't compare to a Falcon Punch so Norris is dealt 30% damage, up to 45%*
*norris roundhouse kick, cpt falcon to 30% damage. Falcon knee, norris to 60% damage. Norris rushes him, Falcon retaliates with the Falcon thrust. Norris is dealt 20% damage and flies off screen.
Captain Falcon: "Show me ya moves!"
Captain Falcon: "Show me ya moves"
*Chuck Norris inches Cpt. Falcon's way and kicks him in the leg, dealing 10% damage to Cpt. Falcon*
*Cpt. Falcon is hurting so he Effin' kicks Norris, dealing 15% damage to Norris*
*Both charge up their power punches, both punches collide... Unfortunately, a norris punch doesn't compare to a Falcon Punch so Norris is dealt 30% damage, up to 45%*
*norris roundhouse kick, cpt falcon to 30% damage. Falcon knee, norris to 60% damage. Norris rushes him, Falcon retaliates with the Falcon thrust. Norris is dealt 20% damage and flies off screen.
Captain Falcon: "Show me ya moves!"
by raw doggy June 3, 2010

The romantic pairing of Emma Swan and Captain Hook, aka Killian Jones, on the ABC TV show, Once Upon a Time.
by Infinityforeveremma.tumblr.com November 1, 2013
