wooden spoon wife 

An ugly spouse. The opposite of a trophy wife. From the British tradition of awarding a wooden spoon to someone finishing last in a competition. Something to be ashamed of.

Jim just got married. Is she attractive? No she's a wooden spoon wife

wooden spoon wife by Jebby3 August 9, 2009

wooden spoon family 

an eye for an eye makes the world blind .

p1: ya wooden spoon family

wooden spoon family by ... Zjdbckdnznsjd March 12, 2019

Wooden spoon karaoke 

The rediculous endeavour of singing kareoke whilst using a wooden spoon in lieu of a microphone.

She ate that song during wooden spoon karaoke

Wooden spoon karaoke by Phantom1983 February 10, 2024

The Wooden Spoon 

Instead of slapping your partner's ass in bed, you use a wooden spoon and ask him/her why they drank your sake.

"Have you ever tried "the Wooden Spoon"?"

Her: "Oh yeah slap my ass"
Him: *smacks ass with wooden spoon*
Him: "DID YOU DRINK ME SAKE??"

The Wooden Spoon by Nicko Tay July 5, 2020

Whacking the chicken with a wooden spoon 

Term used by women to hide the fact that they are masturbating instead of cooking dinner for their kids.

Kid: Mom! I'm hungry!
Mom: It'll be ready soon. I'm whacking the chicken with a wooden spoon.

Whacking the chicken with a wooden spoon by Thoxis October 27, 2018

Wooden Spooning 

The act of hitting a girl's pussy with a wooden spoon to make it highly sensitve

I was wooden spooning my bitch.

Wooden Spooning by Jay-Jayster September 18, 2009

wooden spooning 

The act of spooning but with a boner. Usually done by two people who are friends/lovers.

Not only were we spooning, but we were wooden spooning.

wooden spooning by Dusty Spangler December 1, 2006