An act (frequently sexual in nature) that isn't illegal but is so embarrassing that one will go to great lengths (even lying to the police) to keep it a secret. The term originated on the TV series "Better Call Saul" in reference to a specific sexual act, but may be used to describe any action that's considered embarrassing.
Detective 1: So, fully clothed Mr. Wormald by himself doing what?
Detective 2: Yeah, come on, man. What?
Jimmy McGill: sighs Squat cobbler.
Detective 1: What's a s-squat cobbler?
Jimmy McGill: Squat cobbler. You know what squat cobbler is.
Detective 1: No, I don't... I don't know what a squat cobbler is.
Detective 2: No, me neither. What is it?
Jimmy McGill: What? And you two guys are cops? Hoboken Squat Cobbler. Full Moon Moon Pie. Boston Crème Splat. Seriously? Simple Simon the Ass Man. Dutch Apple Ass. Guys, am I not speaking English here?
Detective 1: What the hell is a squat cobbler?!
Jimmy McGill: It's when a man sits in pie! He sits in a pie! And he... he wiggles around. Maybe it's like Hellman's Mayonnaise. It has a different name west of the Rockies. I don't know. But, uh, technically, he does a crybaby squat, so there's tears, which makes it more specialized. Not all pie sitters cry. But I'm gonna tell you something: This guy? He's a regular Julianne Moore once he gets the waterworks cranked up.
Detective 2: Pies? What? Like apple?
Jimmy McGill: Guys, I'm not the filmmaker here, all right? Banana cream. I... uh, peach. Oh, and there... And there is a costume involved.
Detective 1: (snorts) You've got to be shittin' us.
Jimmy McGill: Yeah, like I would make this up. Hey, the world is a rich tapestry, my friends. But trust me on this. You don't want to see it.
Detective 2: Yeah, come on, man. What?
Jimmy McGill: sighs Squat cobbler.
Detective 1: What's a s-squat cobbler?
Jimmy McGill: Squat cobbler. You know what squat cobbler is.
Detective 1: No, I don't... I don't know what a squat cobbler is.
Detective 2: No, me neither. What is it?
Jimmy McGill: What? And you two guys are cops? Hoboken Squat Cobbler. Full Moon Moon Pie. Boston Crème Splat. Seriously? Simple Simon the Ass Man. Dutch Apple Ass. Guys, am I not speaking English here?
Detective 1: What the hell is a squat cobbler?!
Jimmy McGill: It's when a man sits in pie! He sits in a pie! And he... he wiggles around. Maybe it's like Hellman's Mayonnaise. It has a different name west of the Rockies. I don't know. But, uh, technically, he does a crybaby squat, so there's tears, which makes it more specialized. Not all pie sitters cry. But I'm gonna tell you something: This guy? He's a regular Julianne Moore once he gets the waterworks cranked up.
Detective 2: Pies? What? Like apple?
Jimmy McGill: Guys, I'm not the filmmaker here, all right? Banana cream. I... uh, peach. Oh, and there... And there is a costume involved.
Detective 1: (snorts) You've got to be shittin' us.
Jimmy McGill: Yeah, like I would make this up. Hey, the world is a rich tapestry, my friends. But trust me on this. You don't want to see it.
by Logan Hawkes July 2, 2016
Get the squat cobbler mug.by Snevet November 6, 2012
Get the Cobba mug.Related Words
cobob
• cobob balls
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• Cobbler
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Callie: Hey what kind of dessert is that?
Faustina: It's strawberry cheesecake. No Cobbz!
Callie: I didn't even ask yet.
Faustina: That is your advance warning.
Faustina: It's strawberry cheesecake. No Cobbz!
Callie: I didn't even ask yet.
Faustina: That is your advance warning.
by momma27 May 24, 2009
Get the No Cobbz mug.Small town in cobourg where all the teenagers are either 1 high af 2 getting wasted 3 both or 4 bitching about each other and causing some fucking pointless drama.
Cobourg. Why would you move there
by Lit guy22 September 1, 2017
Get the Cobourg mug.by CharlacPlaza June 23, 2022
Get the Cobblesome mug.When a close buddy's wife or girlfriend becomes so controlling he no longer is allowed to hang out with any friends he had before they met.
Brad: Is everyone in for our annual guys only weekend?
Jason: Everyone but Jake.
Josh: Damn that is two years in a row now. What gives?
Mike: I heard his old lady is making him help her dad put up a fence and dig ditches that weekend.
Adam: He is really being Cobbished. I doubt he ever comes again.
Jason: Everyone but Jake.
Josh: Damn that is two years in a row now. What gives?
Mike: I heard his old lady is making him help her dad put up a fence and dig ditches that weekend.
Adam: He is really being Cobbished. I doubt he ever comes again.
by thecampingtripmvp May 20, 2017
Get the Cobbished mug.The tuff untrustworthy Mercenary on firefly played by Adam Baldwin. Tends to ware cool t-shirts, has man parts and is the ‘Hero of Canton’.
by Gunrunner June 22, 2004
Get the Jayne Cobb mug.