Samuel’s Sunday church loafers 

Viktor’s fast shoes that broke or smt Idfk anymore

“I’m BFSSCL - barking for samuel’s Sunday church loafers”

Samuel’s Sunday church loafers by Sister in law flo July 31, 2023

church slut 

A church slut is a rare species of the female population that regularly attends church, puts up a perfect facade, fooling all those around her, and in the end, ends up jumping all the dicks in her proximity. While everyone is singing, their eyes happen to travel around the room, looking for the most compatible males. Some of these church sluts plan their outfits a month in advance, making sure that they look borderline holy/down to fuck.

They usually mark their territory by taking a minimum of 5,043 pictures with random males from their church/youth group and then proudly posting their accomplishments on facebook/myspace. A rare conversation usually occurs through facebook or through the phone (text message or phone sex) to keep the suspicions from arousing. However, church sluts keep their dirty work underground. The physical activity stays to a minimum of hugs.
Usually church sluts look alike, and are normally flat and attempt at exposing more skin than needed. Their hairstyles are strangely similar to the next church slut, and they always must wear five inch heels with their outfits.

oh. my. god. becky. look at that girl. she is SoooOOOoOoo flat. kinda reminds me like one of those church sluts!

who understands those church guys
they only talk to her cuz they don't get any action outside of this, ok?
i mean her chest
its just so flat
i can't believe it's so flat
it's like caving in
i mean, it's not legit!

look, she's just so.... boobless

I LIKE CHURCH SLUTS AND I CANNOT LIE. HOW THOSE SKIRTS ARE MAXIMUM KNEE LENGTH HIGH. WHEN A GIRL WALKS IN WITH AN ITTY BITTY CHEST SHE PUTS IT IN YO FACE AND YOU GET SPRUNG!

church slut by BBattleship August 24, 2009

Church Stretton 

A small "town" the size of a village in Shropshire, loved by old people and sad hikers, hated by lovers of fun and entertainment.

2. anywhere with a large conservative majority

Sad old couple: Church Stretton is beautiful!

Kid: No it isn't! There's fuck all to do

Church Stretton by Winkwinkwinkwinkwinkwink December 13, 2010

church shopping 

To go to a new church every Sunday, usually churches of different Christian denomination, in hopes of finding one where the pastor approves of fornication, gay marriage, and wearing jeans to church.

Jerry wasn't happy in the Catholic Church when Father Stephen told him he couldn't bang his girlfriend. Now he is church shopping. So far he tried Lutheran, Baptist, Presbyterian, Methodist, and Orthodox Churches.

church shopping by drlolz August 6, 2014

church street hoes 

Prostitutes who frequent Church Street, many were transvestites

Went down to Church Street to joke the hoes, who were undercover dudes albeit "Church Street hoes"

church street hoes by Anonomous99 October 14, 2012

Church steepling 

Like an Eiffel Tower but instead you hold hands and sing kumbaya.

“Yo dude, we were church steepling this girl the other night and we matched pitches during kumbaya”

Church steepling by Phtbtmgrlz October 22, 2019

church services

Euphemism for sex. Great to use for in-office emails and phone conversations when you think "Big Brother" may be listening.

Greg: "I've taken that bitch out 7 times now and still no church services."
Dan: "You're wasting your time dude. Here, I'll give my sister a call, thats a sure thing."

church services by The Greg July 19, 2004