George Carlin

The funniest man in America. No wait, the world. Not only is he funny, but all of his jokes, rages, and swear words tell the truth. He's a genius, and I salute him.

"We also like bombing brown people! Not because they're terrorists...just because they're brown! Seriously! When did we last bomb white people, when was the last time ANY white people were bombed? Huh? The Germans! And that was simply because they were trying to cut into our action! Dominate the world, BULLSHIT, that's OUR FUCKING JOB! We can't make a decent fucking car, but we can bomb the shit out of your country all right!"

George Carlin is a genius...there's no other way to explain it.

by Fox Mantoek April 8, 2006

Hot Carling Academy

It's the school where you go to learn how to buttfuck. It is located in England and they do not have blowjobs there because they are uncircumsized. Because of this, they resort to buttfucking.

Being enrolled in Hot Carling Academy is disgusting.

by DX25 November 10, 2008

George Carlin

The comedy king who ccan out-funny ANY comedian that has ever set foot uopn this planet!

They're going to ban the toy guns..AND THEY'RE GONNA KEEP THE FUCKIN REAL ONES!!

by James Lowe May 7, 2004

George Carlin

The originator of "Truth Comedy," and the One True God

"I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick!"

by the_ruiner June 17, 2004

George Carlin

George Carlin is the funniest comedian that has ever lived. George Carlin is responsible for the original list of "7 words you can't say on T.V." A man who never cares who he may offend, as long as he has SOMEONE pissing themselves laughing.

George Carlin Quotes

"Atheism is a non-prophet organization"

"People with low self-esteem have earned it"

"Let's give credit where credit is due, and admit that scotch tape was a really good idea"

by NikSno May 22, 2006

George Carlin

Didn't George Carlin say, "'Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "HOLY SHIT....WHAT A RIDE!"', or something like that?

good life clown fun George Carlin

by birdofprey May 20, 2009

Carlinism

The shared beliefs of George Carlin (1937-2008), one of the greatest human minds that ever lived. Carlin taught us that Republicans/Conservatives are full of shit, kids today are largely flawed, God doesn't exist and those who believe in most religion are assholes who kill people for no reason (His words, not mine.), and people in general are scared, weak, evil, manipulative, callous sacks of shit who sit around playing with their pricks until they die, and other such thoughts.

Churchgoer: Hey, I'm going to church, wanna come?

Carlinist: No thank you, I believe in Carlinism, now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go jack off.

by ifyoureadthisthenyoulostthegam April 25, 2010