A person (usually a man) who i such an asshole that people leave the room when he enters and announces his presence.
At Jake's wedding, Dan was such an ass monkey that entire sections of the bride's family left the reception early.
by Andrew Rentschler June 09, 2004
n. an individual who, when in an argument, just makes up statistics and quotes from authorities on the subject so they look correct
v. to make up statistics or quotes to appear more correct
v. to make up statistics or quotes to appear more correct
n. Dan is such an ass monkey; there's no way that CNN had an exit poll that said that 87% of Americans want socialism.
v. I totally ass monkeyed through that test. There's no way Mrs. Clark will know that Teddy Roosevelt actually never said anything about anarchy's role in society.
v. I totally ass monkeyed through that test. There's no way Mrs. Clark will know that Teddy Roosevelt actually never said anything about anarchy's role in society.
by Monday's Dusk February 22, 2009
A "kiss ass", "brown noser". A person who is trying to impress someone by following them around...closely.
by Anonymous August 26, 2003
"hey, should we invite Ben around tonight?"
"nah, his ass monkey Matt will have to come too."
"oh yeah. let's not."
"nah, his ass monkey Matt will have to come too."
"oh yeah. let's not."
by turnip bukowski September 26, 2006
Small monkey like creatures the size of leprichauns who crawl around your ass while your asleep. ass monkeys usually wedgie guys in tighty whites or chicks wearing g's or thongs. As monkers are also the reason lint appears in your ass. If you capture an ass monkey it will play poker with you.
*Chick* I got such a wedgie last night
*guy* Me to, I blame ass monkeys
*Chick* You were tighy whites? You a fag nerd
*guy* Me to, I blame ass monkeys
*Chick* You were tighy whites? You a fag nerd
by PAki chan June 03, 2005
in my opinion an ass-monkey has not one but two definitions;
1.someone that follows someone else around and won't leave them alone.
2.a type of flea that hangs around in your arse hair.
1.someone that follows someone else around and won't leave them alone.
2.a type of flea that hangs around in your arse hair.
" i have to go and feed the ass-monkeys that live in my arse with the dried shit that is incrusted in my arse pubes.""
by lee! November 23, 2003
Sean is an ass monkey
by OfficialAssMonkey October 08, 2018