acquisitionist

A media & software hoarder. A person who's bandwidth, storage space, and desire to acquire intellectual property greatly exceed their ability or availability to enjoy even a small percentage of it.

Not to be confused with the typical obsessive collector: the acquisitionist distinguishes his or herself by having enough media to require several human lifetimes to even watch / play / listen to it all.

Maxwell: Hey Jorge, want to come over to my house and hang out? I just bought five new terabyte drives and I've already loaded them up with 1000 new movies, the entire N64, PS1, PS2 and Game Cube catalogs, the Virgin music catalog, and 10,000 hours of porn.

Jorge: Ok, I guess that might be alright. Hey how's your daughter doing? I hear she's started walking?

Maxwell: I wouldn't actually know; I'm an acquisitionist now; I tend to spend every waking hour downloading.

Jorge: Look, I've got to be somewhere.

by malarky2020 October 19, 2009

Acquisition 4

An adjective used in reference to the 4 fake files that are always options when you try to download a title in Acquisition. One is a _______.mpg, one is a _______.zip, one is a ______.mpg, and one is a "_(the term you tried to download)_ girl has a shaking orgasm.mpg (Quicktime)". Even if the file you are looking for is not there, the Acquisition 4 becomes a downloadable option that will not be what you were looking for at all when you go to play them.

"I almost fell for his Acquisition 4 dick size."

"i missed a class and Acquisition 4ed an excuse."

by angieledbetter January 20, 2009

Alternative Acquisition

Employing non-traditional means of possession. Including but not limited to, theft, extortion and ground scores.

"Honey I think our son is involved in a stereo-theft ring"

"Nonsense dear, Billy explained that he got all this fancy stuff through Alternative Acquisition."

by Mike A.N January 15, 2010

curbside acquisition

Formerly known as "trash picking." Used to indicate you've gone through someone else's trash to decorate your own home.

"Early Saturday morning is a perfect time for curbside acquisition."

by melicia May 20, 2004

acquisition

a p2p program for macintosh computers.

I just got the entire first season of Trailer Park Boys off Acquisition!

by calvin April 18, 2005

Acquisition phase

The early stages of a relationship whereby one or both parties show only their desirable qualities. They fail to disclose their flaws, true personalities, and true desires in order to be accepted, loved, and taken to the next stage of a relationship.

Once the acquisition phase was over, she wasn't nearly as likable.

by Intuitive One August 23, 2022

Ukulele Acquisition Syndrome

Noun. A disorder that compels ukulele players to continuously purchase new ukuleles in a desperate attempt to find perfection often characterized by uke hunts online.

Rock's Ukulele Acquisition Syndrome often led him to uke hunts in Hawaii.

by Immodest May 17, 2022