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jessica lange

basically the most perfect actress alive; made her rise to fame in the remake of King Kong and is now kicking ass on American Horror Story
person 1: did you watch ahs: coven last night?
person 2: yes! jessica lange is perfection
by ahsfan1111 November 19, 2013
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Queen Jessica Effect

When Queen Jessica is in the Houston area, all Houston professional sports teams currently playing win. When Queen Jessica is not in the Houston area, it makes it possible for Houston professional sports teams to lose.
Queen Jessica was in the Houston area on October 22 and the Astros won the ALCS and the Rockets won their home opener! The rockets have lost every single game since then. The Queen Jessica Effect is true!
by smashgod9999 November 3, 2021
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jessica's mountain

The part of your pants or shorts around the crotch and zipper where excess zipper and fabric material fold outward forming a bulge, resembling a mountain, or even a boner; though both males and females are often victims of jessica's mountain. Jessica's mountain can usually be seen when one is sitting down.
austin: dude do you have a boner?

josh: no man. that's just my jessica's mountain.
by jotagion June 15, 2008
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jessicas mountain

The part of your pants or shorts around the crotch and zipper where excess zipper and fabric material fold outward forming a bulge, resembling a mountain, or even a boner; though both males and females are often victims of jessica's mountain. Jessica's mountain can usually be seen when one is sitting down.
austin d: dude josh, do you have a boner?
josh a: naw man thats just my jessicas mountain
by joshhhhhhh a June 19, 2008
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She's no Jessica Alba

A phrase used when defining the beauty of other females / female celebrities. (Refers to the actress, Jessica Alba, who is more commonly known for her beauty and hot body rather than her acting skills.) This phrase can be replaced with Megan Fox and/or any other top hottie of your choice.
Holly: "Do you think that girl is pretty?"

Nicole: "Yea, she's okay. Don't get me wrong, she's gorgeous, but she's no Jessica Alba."

Holly: "Of course not."
by lyssaloo July 12, 2009
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Jessamay

Her laugh could light up a whole city. Don't let go of a jessamay she is special and will be your first and last thought. Jessamays are just perfect.
Did you see that new girl! Her name must be jessamay
by Anonymousx34926 November 7, 2016
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Jessica Hall

A wonderful name that means "gracious gift from God".
A girl you are lucky to know. Jessica's tend to have the brightest smiles. They usually give you full attention & have an intense stare that can be intimidating, but they are so sweet there is no need to be intimidated. If you are a guy & you let a Jessica get away then you are a dumb shit because Once a Jessica loves, she loves forever. Jessica's deserve guys that will go to the ends of the earth, & walk on fire to be with them. That's how amazing they are. Jessica's are also good friends that are always there for a friend in need. They are Loyal, kind & forgiving. Anyone who would take advantage of or lie to a Jessica is a worthless piece of shit who doesn't deserve to live. If you have ever wronged a Jessica you should be eternally ashamed of yourself.

Jessica's stand up for what is right, & tend to do the right thing. They are never to proud to say sorry if they do the wrong thing. Basically Jessica's are amazing.
person1: Jessica Hall rox my sox dude
person2: Jessica Hall effing kicks epic ass
person1: No shyt mane...wanna ring her up?
person2: Nah dude she's way outta our league.
by Miss_Merody November 5, 2011
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