the "i need to walk slowly" shit

when you need to shit so bad that you need to clamp your ass cheeks together so you dont shit your pants

also accompanied by a V-shaped walk

When the "i need to walk slowly" shit occurs:

After eating Chinese food, Tom just made it to the bathroom before the full extent of his Lo Mein noodles kicked in.

by Neon Ninja Kills You November 2, 2009

how fast do I have to walk

Someone asking how fast they have to walk for people to not realize they have dupe shoes. Respond with a joke. I.e. "bro can meditate" or "bro gotta start running💀"

Person 1: bro how fast do I have to walk?
Person 2: you can fucking meditate dude.

Person 1: bro how fast do I gotta walk?
Person 2: Nah you have to teleport or some shit.

by Homosheshuals January 14, 2023

I would rather walk briskly through the gates of hell than

A phrase which is used to emphasise how much the speaker wishes not to do or take part in some activity, used as a response to a suggestion or request.

Comedic value is gained from the over emphasis of how much the person would not like to do said activity.

May have origins in a quote from the popular computer game "The Curse of Monkey Island" released on Windows 9x

Murray: You may call me ‘Murray’! I am a powerful demonic force! I am the harbinger of your doom! And the forces of darkness will applaud me as I stride through the Gates of Hell – carrying your head on a pike!

I would rather walk briskly through the gates of hell than attend a Justin Bieber concert.

by Elthrin November 8, 2013

I walk to school both ways

Used usually by Asian parents, trying to show their children how hard it was for them, and also defining the laws of physics where they will also say “When I was your age, physics wasn’t invented yet.”

“You kids have it so easyyy I walk to school both ways, uphill, one one foot, my other one was starting a business.” -Steven’s Dad

by I walk to school both ways March 14, 2022

I walk backwards so it’s always a party

White trash unemployed mullet fashionista that’s all party no work

I don’t need a future no job so I walk backwards so it’s always a party

by Bdog559 January 31, 2020

<.7.9.7.6.>The Riddle: I Am In A Location, In Which, I Walk ANd individuals Can Not Breathe...What Am I To Them. Angel Jose Robles' Interpretation: "'An Occult Detective.'"<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>The Riddle: I Am In A Location, In Which, I Walk ANd individuals Can Not Breathe...What Am I To Them. Angel Jose Robles' Interpretation: "'An Occult Detective.'"<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>The Riddle: I Am In A Location, In Which, I Walk ANd individuals Can Not Breathe...What Am I To Them. Angel Jose Robles' Interpretation: "'An Occult Detective.'"<.7.9.7.6.>

by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 13, 2025

When I Walk, You Can Not Breathe

.

When I Walk, You Can Not Breathe

by Reninu March 17, 2025