Country Blumpkin

An off-shoot of the famous Blumpkin (getting head while taking a shit) but performed in an outhouse. Porto-potties are an acceptable substitute, provided the location is rural.
"Uncle Cooter done got a Country Blumpkin from Mary Jane Rottencrotch last night"
by Texas Haz June 13, 2008
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Country Blumpkin

Sitting out in your rikity old shitter pinching out a loaf while getting a blow job while your dog watches!
Cletus: "Yo' ma! i gotta shit! Come her and put yer kissing tools on my baby maker"

Ma: "Dang, Cletus! Thats yur third turd t'day!"
by Rusty Shackelford March 30, 2004
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Country blumpkin

To receive a blumpkin while using an outhouse.
by Ceegeezy December 20, 2006
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Country Blumpkin

Receiving oral sex while taking a dump, in an out house, from a member of ones immediate family.
"I got into the moonshine last night, went home and got a country blumpkin from my sister Darla..."
by rjpond August 25, 2007
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country blumpkin

Similar to a blumpkin, whereby a male taking a crap receives a blowjob, only this time it's from his sister.
Country blumpkin

"George, how larng are you going to be in that bathroom? The cow needs milking."
"Sorry Mavis, oi'm just saying g'boi to me sister afore she AAARRRHGGHHH oi told you nart to use yer teeth ya mangy old panhandler! Yer as bad as mother!"
by Duderer June 07, 2006
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Country Blumpkin

The act of receiving a blumpkin while occupying an out-house.
Mary walked to the out-house and gave Joe a Country Blumpkin for his birthday.
by Spigot On HOT March 05, 2009
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Country Blumpkin

The act of receiving a blow job from a southern girl while taking a poop.
I heard Hailey gives country blumpkins if you wanna try something new.
by ZeroExe July 11, 2021
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