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bass clarinet

A bass clarinet is a musical instrument. For the uninitiated, a bass clarinet resembles a regular clarinet, but it's shaped a little more like a saxophone and sounds a little more like a cow.
Boy 1: Did you hear that cow?
Boy 2: That's actually a recording of my bass clarinet recital.
Boy 1: Great... um... I think I hear my mom calling...
by Fred Durst jr. December 14, 2008
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Bass Clarinet Player

Usually, a bass clarinet player is a misunderstood, but very useful instrument in a band. Higher than a bari sax, but lower than a tenor sax, the bass clarinet player is the median in a low reed section. Not too high, not too low.
Band Director 1:We need more bari.
Bd 2:We need more tenor.
Bd 3:Nah, both would be over-kill. We need something in between.
Bd 1:We could add some bass clarinets player...
All:YES!

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Our tubas suck, so what do we do? Add more bass clarinets.

-Bass Clarinet Player explanation of what happens to tubas that suck
by Phantom034` November 3, 2008
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bass clarinet player

The most smiley person in the band, always willing to help.
Person: Hey could you help me move the Bass Drum?
Bass Clarinet Player: No problem!!
by 1st Chair December 27, 2009
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bass clarinet player

Usually a player of the bass clarinet which is just like a regular clarinet but lower. Might be friends with the alto saxophone player and may cause unneeded drama in band.
A bass clarinet player that finds the need to date all saxophone players of her class
by alskj November 23, 2007
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Bass Clarinet

Football player 1: what instrument is that?
Football player 2: I think it’s a saxophone...
Drum major: *throws baton* NOT a SaXiPhOnE!

Me: Bass Clarinet!
Football player 1: what the heak is that?
by Emmadilemma1305 March 20, 2019
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Bass Clarinet

THE WEIRDEST FUCKING INSTRUMENT TO PLAY! Often slobbered on by people who deep throaght the instrument while looking insane
"hey your bass clarinet is too far down your throat!"
by trfygubhjknlm May 8, 2019
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Playing the Bass clarinet

To lick your man’s penis, andeat your man’s ass while fingering his penis
She got me off playing the bass clarinet
by Bcmusic July 30, 2025
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