Skip to main content

Braveheart Asymptote

The school of thought in which a movie may approach the level of Braveheart, but may never reach it, only head towards the theoretical infinity where Braveheart resides.

It should be noted that the x-axis on which the Braveheart Asymptote exists does not necessarily refer to a single idea (i.e. quality, awesomeness, number of bagpipes) but rather everything that Braveheart is and all other movies aspire to be.
Dude 1: Independance Day was a fantastic movie, maybe better than Braveheart.
Dude 2: Unfortuntaly, that is impossible
Dude 1: Why's that?
Dude 2: Because of the Braveheart Asymptote.
Dude 1: Oh, yeah, ok I get it.
by Luckystrikered June 23, 2008
mugGet the Braveheart Asymptote mug.

The Asymptote

The asymptote is a sexual maneuver wherein the object is to get as close to the vagina/anus without actually entering.

It is a difficult position, though, as approaching the event horizon may result in prejaculation.
The easiest way to preform the asymptote is to, every few seconds or so (depending on how quickly you want to approach), move the tip of the penis half the remaining distance closer.
by The6thDegree June 30, 2008
mugGet the The Asymptote mug.

download asymptote

When your download speed steadily decreases as you near the completion of the download, such that your download will get infinitely close to finishing, but never actually finish.
The program said it'd take about 3 minutes to finish, but thanks to download asymptote it ended up taking 3 hours.
by solargambler March 15, 2013
mugGet the download asymptote mug.

asshole asymptote

The mathematical function that describes how you can’t really get all of the shit off your asshole by wiping. It is asymptotic and tends towards 0 as a function of number of wipes, but never quite gets there.
With a bidet, it’s actually possible to clean your asshole completely. Wiping just follows the asshole asymptote.
by weyus November 9, 2022
mugGet the asshole asymptote mug.

asymptomatic asymptote

Refers to being in quarantine or self-isolation for an indefinite period of time, and the resulting paranoia and pessimism. Similar to a "Debbie Downer", "Negative Nancy", etc.
Person one: "Is this gonna be forever?"
Person two: "Oh, hush. Quit being such an asymptomatic asymptote."
by qfwfqsnmcvr May 12, 2020
mugGet the asymptomatic asymptote mug.

bad asymptote

said when one wants to:
1. keep it PG AND
2. say bad ass(-ymptote) AND
3. appear smart
Pre-AP Algebra 2 Teacher: Today we are going to learn about asymptotes.
Class Clown: Can't we listen to some bad asymptote music instead?

Two years later...

AP Calculus Teacher: Today we are covering differentiability. Corners, cusps and breaks are not differentiable.

Student #1: What is she talking about?
Student #2: I don't know. Who cares?
Student #3: Hey, did y'all hear about the bad ass fight in the cafeteria?

Calculus Teacher: Student #3, I did hear about the bad asymptote fight, but if you want to pass the AP Calculus Test so that you don't have to take Calculus in college, I suggest we focus on the fact that corners, cusps, and breaks are not differentiable. And yes, breaks can be asymptotes or holes.

Here's a fun way to remember what a break is: A BREAK-up in a romantic relationship is usually due to a partner being an ASS-ymptote. Use your imaginations with the word HOLES...
by faithyeni November 13, 2011
mugGet the bad asymptote mug.

Gaming Asymptote

When you have a greater stats in the least important category then you do for the most important category within a videogame.
When this is achieved, you have achieved the Gaming Asymptote.
Isaac: For fucks sake my luck stats is greater than my damage stats.
Me: yep, welcome to the fucking Gaming Asymptote.
mugGet the Gaming Asymptote mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email