24 definitions by weyus

The act of dispensing glitter onto the face of a sex partner immediately after ejaculating onto the aforementioned face.
Janet: "OMG, Suzy, you look fabulous!"

Suzy: "Yeah, my boyfriend just came over and glitterblasted me."
by weyus May 12, 2013
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The reunion of two people that occurs because one of their online accounts has been compromised and sends spam to the other, resulting in the other to reply and reconnect to the first person.
Joe receives email advertising "Make your penis 20X larger with just one pill!" from an old acquaintance, Bob.
Joe replies to Bob: "Hey Bob - looks like your email got hacked. How have you been, man? The family is well, I hope? I just started a new job down in the valley - it's going pretty well. We should catch up over drinks sometime."
Bob replies: "Thanks for the heads up, Joe. I changed my email password. I'm excited to see you for a spam reunion."
by weyus September 25, 2013
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A bowel movement that stinks to high heaven, leaves streaks on the toilet porcelain, and in many cases, induces tears in anyone who comes near it. Anyone who comes in contact with it feels like it's an environmental disaster. Often the consistency of a chocolate soft serve ice cream.
Dan: What the fuck just happened in the shitter - it stinks like Love Canal?!? Wes - what did you do?
Wes: (sheeplishly grinning) I just took a toxic waste dump. Soary.
by weyus July 26, 2018
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The worldwide cabal of globe (and sometimes atlas and gazetteer) manufacturers that foments discord around the world in order to promote revolution and the creation of new national boundaries in order to promote sales of their products.
John: Did you hear about that revolution that started in southwest Namibia? You can guarantee that Big Globe is behind it. Of course, that's nothing like their crowning achievement, the dissolution of the Soviet Union.

Richard: Bastards.
by weyus July 27, 2016
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The mathematical function that describes how you can’t really get all of the shit off your asshole by wiping. It is asymptotic and tends towards 0 as a function of number of wipes, but never quite gets there.
With a bidet, it’s actually possible to clean your asshole completely. Wiping just follows the asshole asymptote.
by weyus November 10, 2022
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An area of the body that generates absolutely no sexual arousal of any sort when stimulated.
Dan: Gurllll, I'mma lick yo elbows 'til ya squirt...
Julie: Stop it fool - don't you know the elbow is an errorogenous zone?
by weyus March 28, 2018
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The process whereby a woman uses her vagina to transport items (usually contraband). A female-only alternative to the prison wallet.
Mary: Hey Bob, here's that pot vape pen you wanted.
Bob: Thanks! But how did you get it past customs?
Mary: I did a bit of cooter haulin'.
Bob: (as he gingerly sets the pen down) Ummm, thanks?
by weyus July 26, 2018
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