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shit stories

stupid lies, rumors, gossip and made up stories that wusses and bullies tell themselves (and sometimes to others) in order to feel macho, 'informed' and powerful when in fact they are nothing but juvenile ignoramuses who go through life using 'big name' labels for other (different) people who have no idea what those words even mean. Shit stories are so ridiculous that nobody with any sense would believe them but these churlish idiots tell these things to themselves because they know they are losers.
1. Tom always shoots his mouth off in the locker room badmouthing football teams and rock groups that he knows nothing about. He always goes around telling shit stories about himself and he loves to put everyone else down. Everybody else in school is either a 'faggot', a 'nerd' or if it's a girl she's a 'bitch'. He's just a juvenile imbecile that nobody likes.
2. Donnie Douchebag Trump always talks shit stories about how women just love him, America loves him and now he says he's the 'chosen one'. He knows he's a jerk and in reality he cozies up to dictators and he loves to get his ass spanked by a ho.
by I Saw U2 Live Twice August 31, 2019
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Shit Shuriken

The act of weaving a penis into a pretzel shape then stretching said penis to the rectum via the gooch to coat it in faeces. Then as the penis unravels itself, the faeces is used as a projectile towards the others in the room. Often used in orgy situations.
Orgy Member 1: Oh my god, Dylan's gonna do the "shit shuriken".
Orgy Member 2: Brace yourselves!
by Pikaster December 21, 2018
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Martucky Shit Show

A bi-monthly gathering typically in the evening hours when a very, very Simple Majority of Martucky city officials bordering on collusion always vote together and take special pride in their lack of transparency and accountability to the public they serve. Special emphasis on treating constituents with disrespect that often leads name-calling, stonewalling, public ridicule, and cussin'.
Wow!'I went to Martucky city council meeting last night and it turned into a real Martucky Shit Show!
by Barney Ushley January 8, 2025
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shit

1. a type of mush that seeps from your ass
2. a phrase you would use if you are in trouble
1. Mom: come outside and get off that damn playstation! Jim: not now im taking a shit!
2. girlfriend: honey im pregnant! you're going to be a father! Jim: shit.
by yomama.coma December 4, 2020
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shit

shit = bad (this is A shit)
shit = good (this is THE shit)
shit = object (this shit is easy)
shit = person (look at that piece of shit)
shit = nothing (I don't know shit)
shit = anything (I can't deal with her shit)
shit = disbelieve (no shit!)
shit = surprise (aw shit!)
shit = poop (I took a shit)
shit = care (I give a shit)
shit = don't care (I don't give a shit)
shit = bully (to take shit)
shit = insult (give someone shit)

shit = insult again (talk shit about someone)
by miguelh2 November 1, 2022
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Shit your pants

The worst thing that can ever happen to you
Guy 1: you shit your pants?
Guy 2: yeah
Guy 1: *laughs*
by Nonexistant 😔 😔 😔 April 24, 2022
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Can't have shit in

Can't have shit in is a phrase users say online, it has a US state after the "in" part (it varies with any state).

It originally started out after someone posted a picture of their house and their porch missing on Facebook captioning it with, "Opened the door 🚪 and fell I’m pissed 😤 Can’t have shit in Cincinnati mfs done stole my porch bra 😠". Someone then re-posted it and re-captioned it to ,"Someone stole my fucking porch . I opened my door an fell 🤦 ♂️ u can't have shit in Detroit". The "Can't have shit in" phrase spread like wildfire with it varying between US states/cities. It points to the fact that you can't have shit anywhere without some mf taking it even if it has the littlest value to it, it also points to the fact mfs will just steal the most obcure random thing.
Person 1: Nahhh bro mfs done took all the shingles off my roof
Person 2: Can't have shit in Detroit
by Iwantamommysooobad November 10, 2022
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