Skip to main content

Old Man Krumpletoots

Legend has it that Old Man Krumpletoots was a Scottish fishmonger and Dandy who was violently crucified by the local townsfolk for cropdusting the farmer's market with heinous haggis bombs. He did not die, however, and became immortal when he prayed to Santa to save him. Now Krumpletoots leaves dead fish under the pillows of good children, and wet farts on the pillows of bad children on Mitmas Night. The greatest gift a child can be given is to be kissed on the bum by the sweet crack of his Mitmas Miracle Whip.
Old Man Krumpletoots left me a dead herring! - child on Mitmas morning
by Throbbing Dingus December 25, 2018
mugGet the Old Man Krumpletoots mug.

old fire horse

A person who sticks to a habit or routine.
Even though he retired a year ago, Kyle is such an old fire horse that he still gets up early every morning..
by Ji2m October 10, 2015
mugGet the old fire horse mug.

old crone's warning

Noun- a thing hotter than sky valley sriracha sauce but colder than dry ice. Wait what's colder than dry ice? An old crones warning. When your partner fills their mouth with sriracha and uses their mouth to force it down your dick hole so that you #feeltheFUCKINGBURN!!!
Bro 1: Hey bro, guess what? I got my partner to perform the Old Crone's Warning on me last night in bed.

Bro 2: Aw sick man, how was it??

Bro 1: Dude, the old crone definitly warned about it for a reason.

Girl: how did that old crone's warning feel baby?

Guy: GHjHgGuJiIGfFfFUiwkkejejsusyegehdhdueheshuahHggHjkajsbsh!!!!!!!!!!!! FFFFFfUUUuUuUuUuCCcCcCcJkKkKkKk!!!!!! sriracha
by Dick42 March 31, 2016
mugGet the old crone's warning mug.

Old Man Jankins

A old man, typically used in a stereotypical way of a cranky old man, that always yells at children to get off his driveway, porch or more commonly used, lawn.
Man, 'Old Man Jankins' a prick...
by Slutty Pikachu69 May 30, 2016
mugGet the Old Man Jankins mug.

The Old Cedric To Edward

1: When someone really cool, polite, and yet unpopular goes up a notch on the Asshole Scale.
2: When someone realizes their true identity as a homosexual. Tends to happen after a bad relationship, or getting killed by Lord Voldemort.
1:
Person 1: Dude, what is Cam doing with the popular kids?
Person 2: Oh, as they walked by us earlier, he knocked my tray of the table, so they invited him to go sit with them.
Person 1: Well, he really pulled the old Cedric to Edward on us, didn't he?
Person 2: I know! What an asshole!
2:
Person 1: Did hear about Jerry and Rosalin?
Person 2: Yeah, I'm glad Jerry finally broke up with her!
Person 1: But did you hear that he's dating a dude now?
Person 2: No way!
Person 1: Yeah! I'm glad though, he's seemed so much happier since he pulled the old Cedric to Edward.
by ruk182 February 7, 2010
mugGet the The Old Cedric To Edward mug.

Old man piss

Guy in the toilet before me went for an old man piss, dirty fucker didn’t even wipe the seat
by Slazenginho November 28, 2021
mugGet the Old man piss mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email