a person, especially a police officer, whose occupation is to investigate and solve crimes, but had to suck a ridiculous amount of dick to get to their position.
by axis32 April 17, 2023
by Mike Mike Mike Mannnn September 25, 2020
A.k.a. finely-pulverized talc. A substance utilized when you want to find out who's been cutting the cheese, but nobody's willing to 'fess up; the simple procedure involves having everyone strip down and stretch out on their stomachs, whereupon you sprinkle a moderate dusting of baby-powder on the lower half of their ass-cheeks, then watch for a "puffball eruption" --- busted!
Using fart-detecting compound can indeed be an excellent way of reliably determining "who did it", but you will want to be wary about slapping said odiferous-offender's butt afterwards, especially if you're an attractive female --- as you are all too aware, many dudes actually **enjoy** getting spanked by a cute gal (we find it fun and hilariously amusing, plus it makes us horny), and so your hot-headed attempt at getting back at said "whistleblower" may actually "backfire" --- literally! (Pun not intended, but certainly spot-on appropriate in this instance!) Said gassy dude --- and by extension, one or more of his other buddies in the room --- may then begin actively "tuning up the brass band" (and possibly even chow down on baked beans or other gas-producing delicacies to ensure an ample/continuous "supply" ) so as to "earn" smartly-administered swats from you, eventually leaving you with stinging palms and a major headache from da resulting stench.
by QuacksO December 05, 2018
by Anabelvsg October 21, 2019
The guy's wife started fucking the special victim's detective until he changed the way he looked at domestic violence, he started seeing things her way after that (as her husband once had early in their relationship).
by Solid Mantis October 24, 2020
A man who will find your bicycle anywhere, anytime no questions asked. Legend says he has never been stumped by a bicycle missing. call this number now 1-800-273-8255
person 1; My bike is missing!
person 2; Call the Bicycle Detective! I heard he found his own bike in less than two weeks!
person 2; Call the Bicycle Detective! I heard he found his own bike in less than two weeks!
by missing bike January 26, 2024
by Gusty Jeep Collection October 30, 2023