Cooking the books

when a postal employee has little to no mail for a day, yet they stay out past 8 hours anyway.
204b- Whats taking so long today Dave?
Dave- Just out here cooking the books!
by Unknownpostman October 07, 2021
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titty book

a book of titties; or a simple non-titty-associated book: the word is usually used between the hours of 2 am and 6 am, although excessive usage may lead to addiction to the term
This titty book is so hard to read!
by squiderm June 04, 2007
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thicktional book

i am no longer calling it the 'fictional book'. with the amount of hoo-ha coming out of theists, you need faith, or he works in mysterious ways, i am too dumb to read up on peer reviewed science, and there is no logic nor facts to go with it.. just beliefs; therefore, i am, from this point on, referring to it as the 'thick-tional book' with focus on the theist sheeple in a derogative way.
go read your thicktional book and find me proof of facts.
by sams2500 December 09, 2023
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Book Addict

Someone who is a hopeless romantic and loves reading. They read spicy or soft romances and want what the characters have. They haven’t had a stable relationship in a while
Oh look! She is a book addict! She is already reading Twisted book 4!!
by Loreleigilm0r3 November 03, 2023
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book addict

A person who cannot stop reading and is in love with so many fictional characters (that all die in the end btw) that they cannot count
My friend Joan is a book addict
by sexcgod April 16, 2021
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let me read my book

This person is a NERD they also have big eyes and like walking in circles after they have used the restroom if you see one take a picture
Look it’s a person who wants to read their book (LMRMB) #ultrarare #takeapic let me read my book
by CHOPFINGER December 06, 2021
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Book Advertisement

Really, it's just a 2 and a half hour long transactional book advertisement.
Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Hey! Heyhey! If I promote your book will you affirm my thing?"

Sad Dad "Uhh... Yah... Yah I'll do it."

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Great! Hold on.... Ok. Rolling. Say, what do you think of my thing? Isn't it obviously correct?"

Sad Dad "Oh, yeah for sure man. I totally saw that and your thing is totally correct."

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Yes. Great. And the people coming after me. They are clearly all of the bad words. Isn't that what the studies say?"

Sad Dad "God, yeah, I... They are all of the bad words. I noticed that before you said anything. They're sadistic and narcissistic and all of the other bad words. And YOU'RE like my hero. Your existence in my life is functionally equivalent to having saved me from a burning building."

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Hmm... Yes, yes... I see... I guess I was right all along. Pst (Now do your book)"

Sad Dad "Huh? Oh! Oh, ok. Yeah, I wrote a book. It's good. It's about all them mind parasites you got in your brains."

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "And?"

Sad Dad 🤨 "Oh! Yeah, and it affirms your thing."

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Good. That's good."

Iam "Hey! It's Dr. Jeepjorp! I haven't seen you in months!"

Hym "Why are you watching that crap!? You know it's just a 2 and a half hour long book advertisement."

Iam "Yeah but it's bizarre to watch..."

Hym "Alright..."
by Hym Iam July 28, 2023
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