bed crystal

a pebble-like crusty substance with a sticky surface, formed from many years of built-up unwashed mattress scum, reaching its final form through vigorous movement. This is typically located between the mattress and bed sheet

Haven't scrubbed my mattress in a few years now, better check for those bed crystals

by mattress lover January 4, 2026

bed-fixing embrace

A tender wordless arms-around dat you perform wif yer sweetie during a shared slumber-period when you realize dat da blankets are in disarray; what ya do is to softly cradle her in yer arms, super-gently draw her upwards or sideways off of da bed and silently clasp her in a standing position for a long moment (slow-'n'-gentle shoulder-blade-scrunchies and quietly-affectionate lips-to-lips smooches optional, but often helpful in making said snooze-interruption even less distressing for her), then slowly-and-dreamily release her as you gradually step back a pace, and then immediately set about straightening up da blankets and pillows so dat she can see right away why you performed said unusual/unexpected bodily-maneuvers wif her.

Always employing a bed-fixing embrace will ensure dat your nap-sharing snuggle-bunny will never significantly mind having her sleepy-time occasionally disturbed, since it will mostly take da shock or "sting" outta said interruptions, plus of course it will have two hugely-welcome additional perks --- extra SNUGGLEZ, and being able to crawl back into a neat-'n'-comfy bed, and thus she can doze off in yer arms again in freshly-smoothed-blankets-and-tidied-pillows comfort.

by QuacksO January 29, 2025

bed nerd

Someone who is sex-literate and fluent in pleasure.

"My boyfriend is such a bed nerd. I learn something new and exciting every time."

by Scooby Doo 123 February 21, 2025

Bed Soup

Ejaculation that occurs while in a bed. Or soup that you have in bed.

I had to wash the blanket covered in bed soup.

by Uneven curtains March 16, 2025

Hork a fatty and go to bed

To snort a large line of cocaine and then immediately lay down and go to sleep. Usually used in jest.

"Let's hork a fatty and go to bed, I have along day tomorrow"

by BarryCat June 3, 2024

Bed Lick It

A term used to express extreme sexual potency between men by stripping oneself and biting the headboard of a bed while prostrating your genitals to your partner

I like the way you bed lick it baby

by benjamit June 3, 2024

Bed body

Someone who likes to stay in the bed.

She is a bed body.

by anonymous June 8, 2024