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The Real Housewives of New Jersey

A television show that features 5 middle aged women that are constantly clashing with one another. 4 of the 5 cast mates are related while the 1 was a stripper and ex-convict.

Teresa Giudice - Really dimwitted Italian woman
Jacqueline Laurita - Only normal woman on the show.
Caroline Manzo - Takes her family values to the extreme.
Dina Manzo - Carolines sister in law, two face.
Danielle Staub - The whole show's front story.
Typical dialog in a "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" episode

Teresa: Dina, did you hear about Danielle being a prostitution whore in the 80's?

Dina: Yes, and I have read the book and will deny it in future episodes.
by boxxybaybee June 17, 2010
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The New Jersey

A sexual term: Farting while masturbating.
"Damn son, I just walked in on Alec doing the New Jersey!!"
by Anthony0001 July 24, 2008
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jersey club

A genre of electronic dance music with strong roots in hip hop, downtempo, R&B, and trap. See: Cashmere Cat, DJ Sliink.
"Soundcloud has some excellent new Jersey Club producers coming out right now"
"The DJ played a set of house music and jersey club"
by contactballer October 12, 2013
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Jersey

There aren’t any actual guidos (orange gorillas) from the Shore. If you see any at all, they’re fucking bennies from Staten Island.

Most Jerseyans talk like Phillidelphians; only the far northern ones talk like New Yorkers.

It’s Jur-zee, not Joisy, you little shit.

We all do say “cawfee, tawk,” etc. And many say “worter” instead of “wadder”.

We ARE the Garden State. Don’t be an ignorant prick and assume Jersey is full of smog and factories like Newark. The entire South and Central of Jersey are covered in forests, beaches, and farmland.

Taste our tomatoes, corn, and cranberries. They’ll change you.

Jersey drivers are used to jughandles, circles, and tons of exits. We can drive anywhere.

You bet we will hunt you down and call you a “fucking motherfucker” if you cut us off.

Shit’s expensive. A loaf of bread will cost your soul.

We cry heavily-taxed tears. We find comfort in: the Shore, Six Flags Great Adventure, and pizza.

On that note: Jersey pizza is the best pizza. In Seaside, slices are as big as your head (dead serious).

Major fact about Central Jersey: PINEYS EVERYWHERE. Look them up. In short, they’re northern rednecks from the Pine Barrens.

Porkroll, pizza, subs, bagels, Italian Ice, cheese steak, and coffee are the staples of our diet.

WaWa is love. WaWa is life.

A traditional, New Jersey only holiday: Mischief Night. The night before Halloween where we fuck up the town: slash all the tires, egg everything, and toilet paper all kinds of shit. Good times.
Ode to the Garden State:
Oh Jersey, I love thine concrete, graffiti-ed city blocks,

And densely packed suburbs, full of middle-class, football obsessed Italian families,
Your greatness by far outshines your neighboring New York,
Just look at your tons of hilariously sexual-sounding bodies of water: Hackensack, Mullica, Assiscunk, Ballanger, Ho-Ho-Kus, and Sluice,
Love is eating tons of pizza, fried oreos, and Rita's Ice, then riding everything on your wonderful boardwalks and puking the night away,
Those festive Halloween mornings in good ol' Jersey are not complete without walking out on your porch to a street of fucked up cars, smashed windows, and white streamers covering every roof panel of every house,
Dear, sweet Jersey, we will proudly display our "Jersey Girl" stickers on our cars and continue to tailgate New Yorkers until they fuck off in your honor.
by MuricanGirl August 2, 2014
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jersey cumshot

Holding in sperm and then releasing it.
Once released, it will follow a parabolic path into a female's eyes, rendering her temporarily blind.

*Allows for a Jersey Hit and Quit.
Girl 1: Girl, did he do the Jersey cumshot?
Girl 2: yea that motherfucker did, how'd you know?
Girl 1: Your eye is twitching.
by jersey4life January 19, 2011
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New Jersey Trash

Lives off of exit 63 of the Garden State Parkway. Lies, steals, and lives in a fantasy all his own JB. He's a walking sexually transmitted disease whore who will blow anyone for attention. He needs to be in jail for being a thief (fired from Adidias in Atlantic City for stealing a co-workers wristlet and Bulgarian passport. Kicked out of a staten island home for stealing jewelry and selling it to cash 4 gold and being caught red handed with receipts on his passenger seat.), He's a pathological liar: On the next Real World cast, cast as a pornstar, a dancer for various clubs in NYC and NJ, works as a promoter for Harrah's Casino, Shot his own calender, Starring on a new Bravo reality series and the list goes on. If spotted approached with a closed fist and hit hard in the face (any area eye, nose, mouth will do).
I just went to Deko Lounge and saw NEW JERSEY TRASH taken out to the curb.
by Dirty Pink Undies April 17, 2011
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Jersey Barrier

Named after the only place on earth where multiple ten foot long, two ton pieces of concrete need to stop people from driving into oncoming traffic.
Thank God there are Jersey Barriers in New Jersey, otherwise head-on collisions would be a staple of driving in that state.
by coopedup13 March 23, 2008
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