A “Simmons” is a Scrooge-like individual, carrying many qualities that range from the following: being a little bitch, virgin, loud/obnoxious, ugly, and a strong reiteration on the bitch quality. To be called a Simmons is one of the most vial, disgusting, panic inducing, gut wrenching, heart breaking, hate crime a person can commit. Please, soon to be fathers and mothers, Do NOT raise your child into being a Simmons.
“That guy was so weird, what a Simmons!”
“Look at that guy! I bet he’s a Simmons for sure”
“Hey You! Nice middle part…SIMMONS!”
“Look at that guy! I bet he’s a Simmons for sure”
“Hey You! Nice middle part…SIMMONS!”
by JellySplat October 23, 2023
A man who is Dutch Irish nerdy and wishes his Sargent was his dad and will usually will ask "You ever wonder why were here?"
by Nothing Airing November 10, 2021
Simmon is a guy who hates cutting people off on the freeway. He’s a phenomenal cook, a great listener and loves world history (with an emphasis on royal dynasties). Some say he’s classy while others think he’s mysterious. Either way, he always smells and looks SEXY. Simmon is probably wearing a grey suit and a black dress shirt, tucked in, no tie, with the top two buttons undone. Simmon is also single, but not for long.
by Say it ain’t so. November 24, 2021
by IceDragonPhoenix June 21, 2021
The admin at the i-series event. He has a record of long running of tournament runs, winning over £1,000,000. He goes by the name of the Simmonator.
by Mr Clarke November 3, 2005
A Jacob Simmons is a person that majorly ignores the people that care about them. Jacob Simmons is someone who will ghost you for days or weeks and then just claim they were sleeping or didn't have their phone. While they're generally a good friend and good company to have around, they do have their flaw of only hanging out or talking to you for a day or two then ghosting you again. A Jacob Simmons does typically have an excuse for always ignoring you however, although they are also typically bad excuses such as "I was sleeping and I just woke up to all these calls/texts" all while having ignored you for over a week.
"My friend just Jacob Simmons me all the time." "Dude, don't even respond just pull a Jacob Simmons on them." "I know you've ignored them for over a month, just Jacob Simmons them."
by Shroomiedaze June 19, 2022