Poached eggs

The spilling of man seed in a hot shower, bath, sink, hot tub, kettle, resulting in a poached egg like substance sticking to your leg hairs and surroundings.

"here mate I poached eggs in my mum's footspar last night"

by anonymous September 2, 2021

poached

Having had anal sex with no lubricant

I can’t believe you’re not sore after you poached Jonathan!

by rain coat June 23, 2022

Turtle poaching

When you punch someone who has a small penis in the dick making there head shrivel like a turtle.

Payton: i got turtle poached by some guy yesterday
thomas: omg is yo dick okay i hate turtle poaching

by Arnold mcjagger June 3, 2013

Poach Cripple

A joke term to compare someone whose leg(s) has been injured and needs crutches, a wheelchair, or another alternative tool to help them move to a poached egg or a chicken without a head.

Jason: What's up poach cripple?

Arron: For the last time, stop calling me that!

Jason: Stand up and face me! Oh wait, you can't.

by daload November 14, 2023

Salmon poaching

Fingering using at least two or more fingers, in a tickling motion. Putting your hand in a wet place, wiggling them about and hoping for a bite.

We were lying in bed together and I decided to do a bit of salmon poaching

by SeansMinx February 29, 2020

Poach

To attempt anal without any lube involved.

I was just poaching and it burned terribly! My hole is on FIRE!!

by SJCHSJFHJCG June 23, 2022

Date-poaching

The act of interfering with a romantic relationship between two people by trying to initiate a date or romantic interest with one of the individuals as they are on a date with each other.

"I couldn't believe the audacity of the guy at the next table; his attempt at date-poaching was so blatant, asking for my friend's number while her date was in the restroom."

"My last relationship ended after a particularly bold instance of date-poaching; someone approached my ex at a concert we were at together, and apparently, it worked."

by Fcking_Chuck July 27, 2025