mushroom bruise

A phallic contusion in the shape of a mushroom inflicted by a forceful blow of a penis to one's body.

by TubesteakNyourI May 16, 2003

mushroom-bruise

A bruise, in the shape of a mushroom, obtained by being slapped with a large penis or penis-like object.

"Dude, I can't believe you goin' out with the new girl from accounting!"
"I'm gonna mushroom-bruise her ass, just for you. Just watch -- she won't be sittin' straight for a week."

by Dharma Midget September 7, 2016

On your Mushroom

When a girl wants your penis. "Mushroom" is the head of the penis.

Usually said by a friend, can be said about your self.

Example #1-Friend

Jim- Dude, shirlena is totally on your mushroom right now.
John- Man I know, its kinda scary.

Example #2-Your self

John- Shirlena was trying to get on my mushroom last night.
Jim- Did you let her get on your mushroom?
John-Yeaaa boy!

by Evilbert October 22, 2009

mushrooms

A spiritually enlightening drug that makes one realize what a crazy, messed up world we really live in. Everything seems more beautiful, nature is more appreciated, and one may experience open and/or closed-eye visuals, often of colourful patterns, or other things depending on amount taken. Best results occur when mushrooms are chewed then swallowed. The senses may also experience new things while on this drug, such as brighter lights, hearing new sounds, etc.

Mushrooms made me realize how beautiful and nice nature is, and I thought I was a hippie for 6 hours. They made me understand that this world is so fucked up and that nothing is original or right, and that we must achieve this state in reality in order to live a fulfilling life. Similar to the beliefs of buddhism though the religion does not accept drugs.

by AshleyIsAHippie June 27, 2005

mushroom dick

as described by stormy daniels, the shape of President Donald Trump's genitals.

“I lay there," she wrote, "annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a mushroom dick like the character in Mario Kart." -Stormy Daniels

by real610phillyhoe September 18, 2018

golden mushroom

A sexual act in which a man strikes another human in the face with the head of his penis while in the act of urinating. Note: not to be confused with the golden mushroom the soup.

After my girlfriend cheated on me, Damion suggested I give her a golden mushroom.

by ruff54 December 14, 2009

Shitake Mushroom Grip

When a woman with very large hands cups your balls and her finger slides up your ass. Similar to a shocker on a woman. It makes your shit ache hence the name.

Cindy's hands were so large that she gave me the Shitake Mushroom Grip when we started to get it on.

by The Bored Mechanic December 18, 2009