Clanch

The art of aggresively using your kegel muscles.

Alicia had to hold in a queef so she clanched so hard.

by chippy17 September 18, 2016

sphincter clincher

A quip, joke, remark, or action that is offensive enough to make the listener(s) gasp or go silent. When the questionable comment is said, the listeners' ring of muscle around their anus contracts and continues to hold in a tight grasp.

Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction and Kramer's (aka Michael Richards) racist tirade are both great examples of a sphincter clincher.

by Seriously Funny December 16, 2009

Cunt Clincher

A fat bitch who has a large vagina, who could crush you with a mere flex of her pelvic muscles.

Jimmy: Holy shit! Shes fat as fuck!
John: I bet that bitch is a cunt clincher!

by Auhxy April 4, 2017

Clenching

A neo-modern activity, involving the act of heterosexual men attending a homosexual nightclub with friends, traditionally for cheap drinks and the prospect of meeting an attractive woman with experimental tendencies. In doing this, the man often has to awkwardly reject the advances of drunk homosexual men, and hence 'clenching' their bumcheeks together.

Can be justified in conversation by shrugging shoulders and saying "YOLO."

"Hey, what are you doing tonight?"

"I'm going clenching with some friends"

"Ha, good luck.."

by Leeroy von Clenchencheek September 27, 2012

Clinchmas

Noun - a holiday. When you have waited a long, long time for your favorite team to make the playoffs. Then, they finally do. Leading up to the clinch is like Christmas when you were a little kid. Clinchmas is the day the clinch happens. Clinchmas Eve is the night before.

Holy crap. The Reds are finally back in the playoffs. Merry Clinchmas!

Or, as a greeting - Happy Clinchmas

by edavis44 September 30, 2010

Sheet Clencher

One who clenches the sheets when taking it up the ass

Krystain is a sheet clencher

by Nickilous October 19, 2005

penis clenching

when one sees someone so un-sexually arousing that the tip of the penis literally clenches shut. One assumes this is a natural human reaction to even the slightest chance of sperm leaving the body and finding its way to an egg housed in the object of one's disgust, thus furthering the insult to mankind that is said person.

Guy 1: "dude, that look on your face, are you penis clenching?"
Guy 2: "Check out Nora the whale over by the concessions stand" (shocker)

by thebiggercat September 12, 2010