Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO

No it isn't Jordan! No it isn't! This is You trying to reframe what constitutes belief to justify taking all of that Christian money. To believe in THE CHRISTIAN GOD is to believe that THE THINGS IN THE BOOK DID, ARE, AND WILL HAPPEN, Jordan. Is the Christian God THERE Jordan. Is it THERE and does it have the attributes it is depicted to have in the bible OR.... OR... IS IT NOT THERE, Jordan? Is that A THING THAT YOU THINK? DO YOU THINK THAT THE CREATURE IS THERE? IS THAT A THING YOU THINK OR DO YOU NOT THINK THAT? ARE YOU A BOY OR ARE YOU A GIRL, JORDAN?

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO! Ok!? So if I don't actually believe in God, then, actually believing in God isn't actually believing in God, OK!? Believing in God is something else entirely! Now... Ok!? You can't just ACTUALLY BELIEVE that God is THERE... You gotta... You gotta, like, grapple with the IDEA that it MIGHT be there! And then you gotta interpret the book so that WHATEVER YOU DO... Is doing the Book! Even if you contradict yourself AND THE BOOK! Right!? See, God (and by extension all higher-order abstractions) is whatever I need to do be, moment to moment, for me to maintain a certain level of moral superiority. So, maturity? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment. Belief? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment? God? You got it! Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment."

by Hym Iam May 21, 2024

The Stomach Thing

When a man presses down on a woman's lower abdomen during sex, pushing on the vaginal wall. This makes the woman feel the penis much better, and so it is more pleasureable for the woman. It may also stimulate the G-Spot.

This is best paired with The Pillow Thing.

The stomach thing makes sex so good

by yourfriendlyneighbourhoodDuck May 19, 2024

computer clicky things

A technical term in the non-computer people world, also known as "tabs"

Tom's computer is running slowly, he has too many computer clicky things open

by Seaward-sausage4 June 1, 2022

Hand circle thigh thing

a tremendous addition to the sex lore commonly performed by someone known as "that motherfucker or perhaps "him"

He did the Hand circle thigh thing it was crazy

by Mrwhippie7676 December 8, 2022

Such a mel thing

When random things repeatedly happen to someone, like they've been singled out by the universe

Person A: She only realised she wore a non-matching pair of socks again when she got to the office.
Person B: Lol. That's such a Mel thing.

by wolfgang_ March 15, 2024

Hot Vape Thing

the hot vape thing, or hot razor thing, is where one takes a hit of a vape puts a razor in their mouth and slowly blows out the smoke.

*virgil; does the hot vape thing*
roman, in gay panic; Oh fuck, thats hot
*logan; silent gay panic*

by EmoNightmare111 June 12, 2022

Things I think while I shit

Shit shart. Shitilly shart. Shit shoot shitilly shart. Shartilly shit shoot. Shootilly shit shat... Shart... I wish I could optimize my shit texture... I'd have to be some kind of weird dork to live like that though... "Hey, Hym. Why do you only eat gummy bears?" "Oh, yeah. Because it keeps my shit both dry and moist enough to minimize the amount of wiping I have to do" They'd think I was insane... Until they tried it... Then they would realize I'm the greatest mind the world has ever seen....

Hym "I don't actually only eat gummy bears but there is an optimal texture and if I could only find it... I would never have to wipe again! But these are the things I think while I shit."

by Hym Iam May 5, 2024