The most majestic footballer to ever stroll the planet. Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t just exist — he blesses the world with his every breath. When he drops his AirPods, they don’t hit the ground - the Earth catches them. He once waved at someone and three countries declared a national holiday. Scientists tried to study his footsteps and accidentally discovered a new element: GOATium. When Ronaldo opens a pack of gum, the wrapper folds itself out of respect. He once yawned during training, and a solar eclipse happened. His mirror doesn’t reflect him — it watches and learns. And don’t even get me started on when he sips water — each gulp echoes through the multiverse as a reminder that perfection exists. Cristiano sneezes? A stadium sells out. He blinks? A volcano calms down. He stretches before a match and gravity takes a break. Honestly, at this point, Ronaldo doesn’t live in reality — reality adjusts to Ronaldo.
by Monkboyinohio June 16, 2025
Get the Cristiano Ronaldomug. Ronaldos are some spunky ass bitches. Probably Italian like 80% of the time and at least 20% communist. Ronaldos are some pimpy dudes (or dudettes, you do you).
by queeeen8 April 10, 2019
Get the Ronaldomug. by Random Words & Definitions November 22, 2023
Get the Ronaldo vs Messimug. The Portuguese devil, the goat. Mr. Clutchnaldo
by Lincoln Eaves January 11, 2023
Get the Cristiano Ronaldomug. SUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
by qasdfgbnsasdcvb nbfdenm n June 21, 2022
Get the Cristiano Ronaldomug. You take a girl back to her place, get into the bedroom, donkey kick her in the fucking teeth, and leave through the fire escape
Yo, I gave this girl the hardest Messi-Ronaldo last night. She called me the next day, but I couldn’t figure out what she wanted, so I went back and gave her another Messi-Ronaldo.
by Messi-Ronaldo ;) April 15, 2019
Get the Messi-Ronaldomug. Best stale bagel in the world. Practically perfect in every way and he was Ole Gunnar Solksjaars savoir.
Bob: Yo, I just ate a stale bagel this morning and it was surprisingly decent.
Me: It must be a Cristiano Ronaldo.
Me: It must be a Cristiano Ronaldo.
by giorgio_chiellini24 January 19, 2022
Get the Cristiano Ronaldomug.