Schrodinger's Penis

The state in which the male penis is both erect and soft at the same time. Where the penis is too soft to be useful in any sexual activities, but too hard to be comfortable. This can be achieved through excessive masturbation in a short duration of time, among many other ways.

"Babe come down on me, I'm horny."

"I can't, I have Schrodinger's Penis."

by AbnormallyLargeSwine November 11, 2020

Schrodinger's Trap

A thought experiment that proposes the following. If you fuck a feminine looking person, and never check if they have a dick, are you gay? Did they have a dick to begin with?

Jock 1: Fucked this cute bitch at the gay bar last night
Jock 2: Bro was it a guy?
Jock 1: Not sure, it was a Schrodinger's Trap

by A Coastal Gay January 11, 2023

Schrodinger's homo

When a person you normally think of as straight compliments you in such a way that you can't decide whether or not that they are a homosexual. There's a 50% chance that they are gay. Especially if they say "no homo."

Rick "Hey those pants really define the shape your ass. No homo."

Steve "Thanks, but is there something else you need to tell me?"

Alan "Rick has always been a Schrodinger's homo. Just embrace it."

by HarryStamperOil December 23, 2022

Schrodinger's leftovers

When you have leftovers in the fridge for a while and you're not sure if they're still good but you don't want to check.

That sandwich has been in the fridge since last week. It's Schrodinger's leftovers now.

by KyojinJaeger January 27, 2020

Schrodinger’s post

When you want to stop scrolling through posts but you need to know whether the next post is good or not. This in turn leaves you wondering “Will the next League of Legends tier list reel actually be morally passable?”

Rational human being: You’ve been looking at Hustler’s University ads all day, have a break.

Monkey brain sigma: Nah I need to know if the next post is good, or I will spiral into Schrodinger’s post.

by Somedudewithtoomuchsparetime January 25, 2023

Schrodinger's asshat

Someone who denies that their head is up anyone's ass much less their own

You know that guy Roger? He's a Schrodinger's asshat, his head is so far up Jerry's ass, yet he denies it

by Åzüre March 13, 2023

Schrodinger's Jester

When someone is both serious and joking, with the deciding factor being how people react. Often times they are serious, but if people react in a way that they did expect or foresee, a Schrodinger's Jester will claim it is a joke.

Person A: "I am a pacifist until I get angry"
Person B: "That isn't how being a pacifist works"
Person A: "Yes it is!"
Person C: "It actually isn't"
Person A: "It was a joke"

In this scenario, Person A was a Schrodinger's Jester

by Mad Cheshire September 8, 2023